TaraBull

Tara Beretsky and Michael Hartman's Wedding

2010-11-07T17:16:00.000-08:00

Tara Beretsky and Michael Hartman's Wedding

sick and tired...

2010-11-07T17:00:00.000-08:00

of being sick and tired!

Well its been over 3 weeks now and I've been plagued! What started out as allergies, progressed into a sinus infection which I stubbornly didn't seek treatment for immediately. I finally went to the doctor and she scolded me for letting it progess that far... a z-pack later I was back at the doctor getting blood work and chest x-rays and found out i have pneumonia and possibly chronic mono... Now I'm on a round of steroids, another z-pack and singulair. I'm completely at my whits end here. The steroids make me slightly irritable, and by slightly I mean INCREDIBLY... However, the fact that I've been sick for 3 weeks doesn't help the irritability at all.

Okay but I'm all about silver linings... so here it is..

The save the dates are ready to be sent out as soon as my stamps arrive! WOO HOO! Yes yes I splurged on stamps to match the STD's... Call it silly if you must. I know they're just going to end up in the trash anyway...
I got to watch a lot of house, discovery channel, movies and (my fav) HGTV the past few days...
We took a trip (or 2) to the new Lowes just down the road to purchase some new light fixtures and ceiling fans to replace the horrendous 1950's fixtures that were here when we moved in.. We also bought a nifty electric heater that looks like a gas stove which is currently keeping the living room nice and toasty while I blog.
Got some laundry done... however only a little bit at a time since its incredibly difficult to do anything physical when you can't take a deep breath.
In other wedding related news... check out the registry at Ourwishingwell.com!
That's about as silver as the lining gets...

I hope my test results come back okay tomorrow. Apparently swollen lymph nodes are indicative of some very not pretty illnesses... Fingers crossed!!!

baad blogger! BAD BAD BLOGGER!

2010-08-10T16:59:00.000-07:00

So, FSIL scolded me via facebook earlier for a blog update... And now I'm scolding myself! Its been 1 month since my last post! Sheeesh! A lot can happen in a month... and well, as always, I'm at work... but I caught a few mins to atleast give an update via mobile pictures!

Well, it just so happens I turned 24 on Aug 2nd... so a lot of really fun things happened... dinner, parties, kidnappings and lots of (responsible) drinking of course... Here's one of my favorites... a buttery nipple! MMMmmmm

Also, a home reno project is underway... TILE!!! You can also see a very welcomed addition into the 9 Clayton family... our new dishwasher!!! :-D

And well, Thor met a new play mate! My dearest college friend Kellie's puppy Harry! Awww!

We've been busy little bees especially since all the birthdays and seemingly endless picnics and parties! Not that I'm complaining or anything...

Well, I do have more pictures at home and I promise not to be such a stranger! Sorry blog world!

inspiration board number 9,854,265

2010-07-10T00:11:00.000-07:00

and counting...

Its 3am, I'm working 3rd shift... I'm tired... and I'm using all my energy wedding-ing.

More cardstock and envelope samples are on their way... design is "in progress" as I have like 50 options right in front of me... I have my favorites we just need the hubby's opinion now...

Ahhhhhh less than a year!!!

another inspiration...

2010-06-18T18:13:00.000-07:00

So, this wedding planning thing has been full of inspirations.... here is a board made by another bride... she titled is "red and brown rustic wedding" I looove it :-)

image from google images...

dressing the bridal party...

2010-06-10T17:15:00.000-07:00

Well, the ladies were easy! (not like that people c'mon...) Now as for the men... I'm completely up in the air!

or...

I'm really all in all a fan of the first combo... but its really hard to tell how its going to alll fit together... I need to SEE it, not just "visualize it" and cut and paste into paint... its just not he same. Hmm, i wonder if I can high jack that dress at beautiful beginnings and sneak it down to deitrich's.... probably not... Soooo many decisions!!!

Call me spoiled...

2010-06-07T18:07:00.000-07:00

But since I've been with Michael the "I WANT IT I WANT IT I WANT ITS!" have constantly been turning into "I HAVE IT I HAVE IT I HAVE ITS!!!" and Saturday's BM shopping extravaganza was NO exception. *Le sigh* no longer... the BM champagne, lacy, strapless, sweatheart, cocktail length dream has COME TRUE!!!! My 5 lovely BM's, my mom, mike's mom and a little chlo bug had an amazing day Saturday. No tears were shed (by the adults), no crankies, no under the breath murmurs, no fighting, no arguing, no sadness, no let down, no disappointment saturday! We found a dress then ate lunch!! <3

On top of that, oh boy oh boy *bounce* do I have pictures from what's been going on at the beloved Hartman Homestead in the past 2 months since Mike's been out of school! We have a new deck, a new pool, a new pot rack, a new stove, soon to be new tile, new ceiling fans, new lots of stuff! *pictures coming soooon*

I know they call really crabby demanding brides "bridezilla" but what about happy-as-a-clam crazy excited brides??? a google search says... "wedding goddess" haha hey, i'm fine with that. :-)

alllllll smiles about everything right now... and (ew) its MONDAY! haha

hit the GOLD MINE!!

2010-06-03T19:49:00.000-07:00

The light gold mine to be exact... designer alfred angelo. *le sigh* i've never seen this dress before, I hope it still exists cause.. i want it, i want it! I WANT IT!!!

programs!

2010-06-02T14:29:00.000-07:00

http://www.weddingbee.com/2010/06/02/wedding-program-format/#comment-1093773

my inspiration board keeps growing and growing! one thing I was totally blanking with a giant brain fart was programs... thanks again wedding bee! lol

really the only reason i post these things is so i can reference back to them when it comes time to start a DIY... but how adorable!!

TABLE RUNNERS!

2010-05-28T17:54:00.000-07:00

Love these, thanks to the hive and special bee vagabondgurl

http://diy.weddingbee.com/topic/vagabondgurls-diy-ruffled-burlap-table-runners

Haha

2010-05-24T11:15:00.000-07:00

I was just looking at my etsy purchases from the past year since Andrea introduced me to it... Everything I have bought thus far has a starfish on it except for 1 thing.... a pair of underwear that says "Mrs. Hartman" on the back in blue for my "something blue" haha

I have a migraine... going back to bed. Which sucks because they're starting the sewers today and there is serious construction goin on outside my house right now.

its been a hail of a day!

2010-05-14T17:25:00.000-07:00

Well, today at about 5pm the Trexlertown area was graced with the presence of a rediculous severe thunderstorm accompanied by a tornado warning. So, I heard the warning on the radio and decided to move to a place in the building where I could see the storm roll in... So, there I was standing at a garage door and BAM hail. At first it was just like, dime size, then nickel, then quarter, then half dollar, then golf ball, then raquet ball, then baseball sized. WELL needless to say I stopped watching at about half dollar sized because the wind was so strong it was BLOWING this huge hail about 50 feet INTO the plant. Thank god for hard hats! So my hopes of watching this storm "progress" turned into running for cover and scrambling to close doors. After the hail stopped I wandered outside to take a gander at the rediculousness mother nature had unleashed upon our area... Which mind you, sounded much like living under a bowling alley, or perhaps subway tracks... and this is what a found.

I also discovered that my car is JACKED UP. No windows were broken, thank god... but my poor HHR looks like a golf ball. Atleast biggy smalls made it through his first hail storm without any serious damage... Unfortunately my car was not the only one damaged... So yeah, after my excursion outside post-apocolypse a voice on the radio told me that "trexlertown has experienced dime sized hail" lol listen buddy... dime sized just doesn't cut it in this case... I have pictures and A RULER to prove it. Mind you, the pictures were taken about 15 mins after the hail stopped and that thing melted a lot on the way inside... PHHHT DIME SIZED. Never a dull moment right folks?

tied up... and twisted!

2010-05-13T18:32:00.001-07:00

so this'll be a fun post. here are some silly ties i found...

my vote is for the lobsters!!! thank you etsy seller toybreaker! what a great shop!

Home improvement!

2010-05-06T14:27:00.000-07:00

Well, this week on Clayton Ave we said bye bye to our blue foundation walls!!
and welcomed a much more muted, adobe beige colored foundation!
I have 2 regrets...
1. Not wearing sunscreen.
2. NOT DOING THIS SOONER!!!!!

What a difference a coat of paint and some elbow grease can make!

I need to post some more before and afters of some things when I have time to blog from home...
- new ceiling fans!
- new euro vanity!
- new bedroom set!!
- new pot rack!
Its always a home depot day for Michael... he's been so productive this week! Well, we both have! Horray! We also got rid of the random metal shower stall in the basement today! I am so excited to spend the weekends doing some home improvement projects with Michael!!

WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!!!!

2010-04-25T19:35:00.000-07:00

a picture is really worth a thousand words... need i say anything else?

flower girl dress... CHECK!

tan suits!

2010-04-24T16:26:00.001-07:00

So, I do believe michael has agreed to the tan suit.
photo courtesy of a bee!

in love...

2010-04-24T14:37:00.000-07:00

well, i hit the jackpot today... while browsing the david's bridal site as I often do to keep me occupied at work, i came across this lovely number.

and found myself a dress to wear for eric and melinda's wedding! :-) The question will be when to bite the bullet and buy the thing... Lucky me, I have a coupon from David's from buying my wedding dress there sooooo score!

off the cuff... link.

2010-04-23T16:31:00.000-07:00

I think I may have had my first bridezilla moment yesterday... yes, over CUFF LINKS. Well, I seem to have prematurely "decided" on the cuff links...

When I showed them to Michael he said the most dreaded word in wedding planning history... TACKY. *shudder* THEN the Ryans of the wedding party also said the word... I like to think of this as the "vuldemort" of wedding planning... "he who must not be named.." "that of which we do not speak..." The T work completely and seriously pushes my buttons, in this "case" my beer caps. (ohhh puns) Soooooo this t-work fiasco has prompted me to rethink my decision for my "wedding day surprise" for Michael but, that's a secret... So YET AGAIN Michael (who claims to want NO part in planning the wedding) has made me go back to the drawing board. Yes, made ME go back to the drawing board... he only wants to veto and nix ideas not EVER come up with ANY of this own. YES the capital letters are made to STRESS my ANGER over the WHOLE SITUATION!

Well, etsy to the rescue this time because I DO have ANOTHER idea for cuff links. Michael actually used an exclamation point to respond to the "what about this..." text message which, is like... completely unheard of in Michael land. Mr. Straighasanarrow got EXCITED about something for the wedding... and of all things? CUFF LINKS. Well, here it is...

My little pirate himself has unused treasure all over the house, I can't believe I didn't think of using his coins for things before... BUT we don't want a pirate wedding all bootied out with glass eyes and wooden legs strewn about now do we? Well, I think they are just darling and much less *gasp* "tacky" than the beer caps. And, they got a rise out of the man... so how can I say no? I think I will utilize the maintenance department here at work... soldering or welding these coins to the blank cuff links...

really... FREAKIN' CUFF LINKS.

with this ring...

2010-04-23T15:21:00.000-07:00

so, I often say this phrase... but I fell in love with something today...

fingerprint wedding bands!!! from etsy shot fabuluster. If you haven't checked them out I strongly suggest it. Even if it isn't for a wedding band... this would be a fantastic gift for a LOT of occasions! birthday, anniversary, christmas... So, if it so happens that michael does not want to get these, I will most certainly want one any way!

yuengling to the rescue!!!

2010-04-22T16:00:00.000-07:00

So, I've been racking my brain for ideas for DIY cufflinks... of course at first I was thinking starfish.

BUT, I understand not EVERYTHING in the wedding can be full of starfish, including mike's groomsmen... So, I went searching. First, I found these...

if you can't tell they are champagne bottles and corks...

Well... then i thought to myself... what do all the groomsmen like... BEER!!!

SO i just ordered blank pairs of cufflinks off of ebay for less than a dollar a pair, and plan to use the furnace here at work to melt some of our resin, pour it in the cap, pop in the cufflink, let cool... BAM cufflinks. Not to mention... THANK YOU YUENGLING for using our wedding colors on your bottle caps... ALSO, for the one and only groomsmen that doesn't drink lager... my very own brother... his very own, custom, one of a kind set of, still matching, champagne of beers, high-life cufflinks!!!

And well, since I ordered 10 pairs of cufflinks and I only need 6 I plan on making some for the ushers as well.

With all these ideas I keep coming up with I'm seeing myself creating an etsy shop after all this wedding planning is done to "showcase" and sell some of my creations!

yes yes... ANOTHER inspiration board...

2010-04-16T14:45:00.000-07:00

This one is flower related...

I <3 dahlias, daisies, and roses... and of course STARFISH! So, this board includes.... red flowers for flower inspiration as well as random other colored bouquets with starfish in them... I absolutely adore sugar starfish (the orange/golden bumpy ones) if you look at the bottom right corner there are champagne sugar starfish I hope to find that color... After all, the reason I picked a champagne and red theme was because of the oh so soothing and beautful reds and tans you see in sea shells... I just keep imagining tropical red flower petals on the beach as my wedding colors... who knew red could be so soothing???

wedding party inspiration...

2010-04-15T17:06:00.000-07:00

lots of inspiration this week...

notice the lack of continuity with the groomsman's inspiration board... the black and tan debate is still going on... But, i've officially decided that I've decided nothing. haha I love the color combos though! <3 I'm swooning over dress #1.. they are all from the dessy/after six collection... as are the colors of the ties/vests.

hmmm if YOU were a bridesmaid which dress would you pick?!?!

more inspiration...

2010-04-13T08:54:00.000-07:00

oh wedding planning... so many ideas! I hope it all comes together. Its hard to imagine some of my ideas in all their glory when they are sitting in the closet in the basement...

i keep trying to put my "theme" into words... so here are a few words for thought...
Sunset, Sand, Champagne.... Now to eleborate... my bm's will be wearing champagne/gold, I will be wearing "soft white." All the flowers will be red. I've been trying to convince michael to wear a linen/tan colored suit but he hasn't been receptive to the idea... It really screws my vision. I don't like black, never really did... but Mike seems to think its the only appropriate color for him to wear... Now how sexy is this?!

Now, I understand its his wedding too and all that crap... but why is this the only thing he has to butt heads with me about? everything else he's just like "yeah that's nice" "i like that" "whatever you want hunny." When it comes to the suits black is what he wants... why? no logical reason... will someone talk some sense into this man?!?! Annnd, the BM dress I fell in love with, I'm no longer in love with... *sigh* This wedding planning thing is a constant "back to the drawing board" process. On the positive end of things... Alice bought me some plain, rather sturdy well constructed flower girl baskets today for $2 a peice. So, the veil that I made and dismantled seems to be a perfect accent! Starfish, pearls and shells... I already have a great idea using tulle and ribbon for the handle... We'll see how that works out.

As far as invites are concerned... I've picked out cardstock and paper as well as envelopes! I'm very excited about my decisions! Thanks to Kristi for showing me the website! It should only cost about $300 dollars for supplies... (estimating 150 invitations) and grossly overestimating the amount of paper and cardstock I need seeing as though i will need extra for placecards and what not... Also, since they are only going to be printed in black, i'm going to use my printer at work... it'll only be about 75 pages (2 invites per page) so I don't even feel bad about it... The color on the invites I will be handstamping with stamps I bought from e-bay for 5 dollars. Oh yes, that 300# includes the envelopes for the save the dates as well. On top of that, I already have a million and 1 address labels... and the RSVP postcards were only 6 dollars from vistaprint... So the total "suite" will cost about $3 (that includes the STD magnets) My lab partner is in for a treat... I want to hand address everything so I'm going to ask her to help out... oddly enough we have REDICULOUSLY similar handwriting... even we can't tell the difference sometimes. So it'll be like cloning myself and cutting the work in half! Phew, invitations were hard... I have like 42 envelope samples... so if I have to send any letters to anyone in the near future and you get a really fancy envelope you know why! Haha

Can I quit my job and become a wedding planner? Ooooo and a florist on the side... *sigh*

Time for shredding!!! Level 3 you get me everytime.

You're my inspiration!!

2010-04-02T00:48:00.001-07:00

as some of you may remember... idea board #1

I now present... Idea board #2

a little info on WHY i'm posting this at nearly 4am. Oh dear ICO bribed us 2nd shifters into working a double shift... Yes, bribed us... I'm making time and a half and getting paid for the holida. WOOP WOOP double time and a half. Is it worth it?? We'll see... Its been a very very very long night! I am oh so glad I get to leave at 5am.

This weekend is jam packed... Go home, sleep, wake up, go shopping with Evie, pick Channy up at work, go to philly, celebrate Ms. Milf-of-honor's B-day!!! <3 Sleep in a hotel in Philly, wake up, go home, get ready, go BACK to philly, celebrate mine and Michael's 15 month-a-versary, stay in a different hotel... Flyer's game at noon! What a weekend... Happy Easter everyone!!!

Hairspiration!

2010-04-01T19:28:00.001-07:00

weddinginging

2010-03-31T16:04:00.000-07:00

found a new blog today!!! ruffledblog.com

Man, I just love it. Check this one out...
http://ruffledblog.com/2010/03/entry-2-diy-window-pane-menu/

Since we're doing a buffet, this would be a perfect idea for the menu! AND the signature drink menu as well!! (less paper in the trash afterwards!!) Plus, I ordered about a million little frames that I have no idea what to do with... BAM use them for "food labeling" on the buffets! plus, i'm a big fan of my handwriting... so horray! I love this idea... LOVE IT! I'm not sure if i've stressed this quite enough but... THIS is not what I want my wedding aftermath to look like....

I much much much prefer a lot of this...

So, an alternative to *gasp* plastic forks...

http://www.webstaurantstore.com/greenware-disposable-wooden-fork-heavy-weight-100-pack/999GWP201.html

and *GASP* plastic plates for cake...

http://www.webstaurantstore.com/solo-bare-6-3-4-square-sugar-cane-plate-compostable-125-pack/9996PSC.html

NO PLASTIC ANYTHING!! Yes, I understand I work in a plastic factory and if it weren't for plastic I'd be out of a job... BUT I also make sure they aren't bringing in carcinogens, dumping things down the drain, using eco-friendly cleaners, 100% recycled paper, recycling ink cartridges, have the right permits, and bla bla bla ANYWAY... the less paper and plastic that we use at our wedding the better for us, the better for our pocket, the better for the environment! :-) At the end of the evening, I would like to be able to load all our "trash" into my car and bring it home for composting. Plates, napkins, yes even forks.. compost is our friend! So one day, when my garden is sprouting pretty veggies and flowers I will be able to thank all our wedding guests for contributing a plate or a fork or a napkin to our compost heap. <3 Plus, all our reusable goodies will be, you guessed it, REUSED! Perhaps in our house, perhaps in somone elses... perhaps sold on ebay. Nothing will go to waste... So please don't wrap our wedding presents in anything but old newspapers... no trees need to be sacrificed for this wedding!!!!!

i leave you with this.... *sigh* oh to have room to store 300 mismatched vintage chairs...

Dresses Dresses Dresses!!!!!

2010-03-27T06:12:00.000-07:00

So, Sandra's wedding is in May and I need a dress!!! Do I utilize my new found love of bridesmaids dresses? I think I just might... I know I will be doing the same for dear Melinda and Eric's wedding. I'll be looking for a tea-length for Sandra's and a full-length for Melinda's. So yes, I will be spending some time at Beautiful Beginnings in the near future... Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps... I'll begin scouring the internet for something riiiight now. Actually, I know what I'll be wearing to Sandra's wedding, how dare I forget my first love! VICKY'S!!... a Victoria's Secret convertible dress which is on sale for 49.99 right now, plus I have a $10 off coupon (starting April 1st!) I'd post a pic... but due to the "lude" nature of the Vicky's model's my work has blocked the website.. go figure. HIZZAH! too bad work! I found a picture on another site!!! Thank you, google images!!

Anywho... for Melinda and Erics wedding I'm thinking something like this...

assuming this style isn't anything like her BM dresses... I should look into that... haha I would like to go with a purple or a pink color :-)

AND, the all so very important bridesmaid's dress search may have come to an end... I leave you with this dress... Dessy-after six style 6576

pictured in banana and palomino... we'll see which on is more the "champagne/gold" I had envisioned when we go see this dress! :-)

Well, so much for dress shopping... looks like I have my picks' pics!!

Ms. Indeshoesive.

2010-03-22T16:16:00.000-07:00

So, shoe indecision dilemma. After having my ruffley red heels on the with the dress last night I'm recondisering them for 3 reasons
1. I will probably trip.
2. I don't want to have to do a shoe change
3. I want a red crinoline.

I had to take a sick day and go to the doctor so I spent most of the day searching for champagne ruffley flats. I have a terrible sinus infection and felt like I got punched in the face.. so I'm on steroids, antibiotics and nasal spray. But that's besides the point.

I found the attached picture. They are from fashion bug and they're cheap!!! haha I love them, I'm going to get them.

I've heard of other brides having a pretty large shoe collection by the time of their wedding and since I found the perfect dress so early in the game, I think its okay to change my shoe-mind a few times. So, we're taking the count to 3.

1. ruffley red heels
2. red mary jane crocs.
3. champagne ruffley flats.

Call me shredder...

2010-03-04T21:41:00.000-08:00

?

No,

?

Yep... so, I'm a little infatuated with this dvd now... I just realized that 20mins's of this can seriously work up a sweat... So yes, bought hand weighs (only 2 lb though). This is day 3, did level 2 (with weights) yesterday and today again... funny story though, to show how overly ambitious I am. I went to work early today, at 1pm, to do "new employee orientation" and worked til 10pm. I didn't have time to do the shred before I left for work so I brought my weights, a towel (for abs) and sneakers and did the shred on my lunch break in my office. Amanda, the other lab tech thought it was pretty entertaining and decided to watch me do the warm up. lol Anyway, level 2 kicks my butt but leaves me feeling fantastic!!! I'm not worried about my weight but I do love me a good work out! I can't wait to try level 3!! Oh man, I'm a little scared. Maybe I'll save that for the weekend!

now, if only my face would cooperate... hmmm... I've been debating trying a bunch of new things but they're all really expensive... I wish the government had a program to write off wedding expenses...

gasp using the internet at work

2010-03-02T17:26:00.000-08:00

So, I've given into temptation and boredom and am surfing the web on my work computer. The only things I've done thus far today is checked wedding bee and found the "etsy wedding street team" blog! AHHH, it is my new favorite thing.

Anyway, I caught wind of the Becker-mitten's booking a mini vacation and that got me thinking... I would adore a mini vacay! I haven't yet talked to Michael about it but I hope he'll be onboard.... I'm up for anything as long as there is sunshine and a pool!!!!! So I will also be doing a travelocity search in the next minute or two... I adore the sunshine!

Did I mention we booked our venue? I forget... but yes, we have officially put down a deposit and worked out a few kinks. The contract was very standard, no need for a older brotherly consult as anticipated and our coordinator was a little less "out there" than before. She even gave us a card for a non-demoninational officiant! And she was VERY excited about some of the plans we already have... We would like to plant a tree at the ceremony... which would mean our venue would have to allow us space to plant one... Guess what ?! Consider it done! That was really exciting to me...

Oh yes, so I've been hearing "The 30 Day Shred" is ALL the rage. So I tried it out today... Level 1. Well, it was rediculously easy... So I've heard on the Bee that some Bees have been doing level one for months and just can't get past it... Well, I'll be starting Level 2 tomorrow. I refuse to use hand weights though... call me crazy but not only do I have NO upper body strength, as soon as I do some kind of strenuous arm-strengthening activity my boobs shrink. Now, that may be TMI for some of you... but I don't really care this is my blog, read at your own will. ANYWAY, I do not feel like sacrificing my full c's for a smaller waist. First of all, that work out was much more arm and butt oriented than I had hoped. The only thing that needs slimming for this bride to bee in her waist. So really, Jillian, you have failed me. However, before I completely discredit the 30 Day Shred and manly Jillian Michaels in all her akward glory, I'll give level 2 and 3 a try first. Then, if back to Julliane Hough's Cardio Ballroom... which I ADORE for many reasons. 1. Julianne is ADORABLE 2. She says "booty" a lot and I like that word. 3. Its fun. 4. It actually works my abs. and 5. Its a lot longer!!! Now, some people may be saying "WTF is this bitch completely off her rocker? A LONGER WORKOUT?" well call me crazy but I've got some stamina... afterall I used to be a cheerleader. Regardless... after level 1 of the SHRED I decided to take the dogs for a walk... err I mean, let Thor take me and Pepito for a walk. Now THAT is a workout... full body engaged in being drug down the street by a 100lb ELEPHANT closely followed by little Pito scuffling along. Its really cute to watch I'm sure, and don't think Pepito doesn't like his walks with his big brother... the little guy would rather run the whole time anyway... The point of all this is that I was really disappointed by this "SHRED" everyone keeps talking about... REALLY DISAPPOINTED. If I wanted to pretend to jump rope and do jumping jacks I would go to CURVES with all the old ladies... I want a stinking WORK OUT PLEASE!!!!!! So, Jillian, you better do better tomorrow with level 2. That's all I'm saying... I will resell your DVD on ebay.

RED SHOES!

2010-03-01T21:33:00.000-08:00

Need I remind you all, the one thing on my mind before I found theeese lovelies...

was infact, red shoes, red shoes!, RED SHOES!!! :-D Then I found this picture...
and now I realize, I have to help my girls find, you guessed it... RED SHOES!! Hizzah! I'm excited. I'm actually more excited about the red shoes than I am about the fabulous $30 bridesmaids' dress that may or may not work for the BM's but may very well work for a bridal party dress! As a matter of fact... I might have to wear it to Sanda's BP instead of my own... Either way, this dress has purpose. I'm also super excited to get my mail this week! The FEDEX man and I are truly having a secret love affair... he brings me the goods, that's for sure. lol. As you saw previously, my list of things enroute to Clayton Ave are an assorted mix of all things wedding.

Work today was pretty awful... all my "wedding documents" were surrendered with a virus ridden computer. When I say "wedding documents" I mean, one sole document which included...
1. The Guest List.
2. A poem I wrote and never saved anywhere else
3. The "song list"
4. ALL my inspiration pictures...(cakes, hair, favors, decorations, etc) Imagine if I made this number all separate cetegories?!?!
5. A page of helpful websites.
6. THE BUDGET.
7. Some things I forget...

I know there were more things... about 35 pages of things... On top of that... work is blocking a ton of websites... which means I can now no longer innocently google search things like.. "red peep toe pumps" or "starfish bouquets" or "when do daisies bloom?" or "how to make a birdcage veil" or "non-denominational ceremonies" or "RSVP postcards" just to name a few...

On a positive note... I found things in the trash (at work) I can use to make our cardbox. I'll leave the details for a DIY blog. I guess I can never say my job "gave back.." Anyway, its time for bed I believe... Did I mention I can't blog at work anymore either? :-(

to bee or not to bee

2010-02-27T09:01:00.000-08:00

weddingbee that is.. or should I say "to blog or not to blog." It seems I can only do one or the other. I blame both of these (blogging and beeing) on one person and one person alone... MRS.GEBELY!!! :-) I say blame... but I really mean "thank" because these two things along keep me entirely entertained while "bored" at work. Ahhh yes and one more vice of mine to blame again on Mrs. Gebely... ETSY!! :-)

Many things have progressed since I last posted. I have found and fallen in love with the very opposite of a BM dress I had envisioned... then again I purchased the wedding dress opposite my vision. So it seems to be the method to my madness I guess. I would post a pic, buuuut I'll let everyone else suffer. MUAHAHAHHA... mother and the BM's have seen the pic of the dress, which I have ordered a "sample" of and by sample I mean, I ordered a dress for my own personal collection. haha! So its really a win win situation for me here... :-)

Yes, I have also ordered a TON of items.... which I will now list in no particular order...

-reception crocs (gauk if you must, I AM a croc kinda gal, $19.99 e-bay)
-save the dates!!! (magnets designed by michael and yours truly apx 30cents a peice, vistaprint)
-photosharing cards (freeeee, vistaprint)
-a free pen. (for the wedding tree, v.p.)
-return address labels (like $7 for 420 of them, v.p.)
-a possible BM dress (30dollars, some website)
-RSVP postcards (freeee v.p.)
-20 yards of tulle (50%off one item from jo-ann total $13. SCORE!) this will be used to tie reserved cards around chairs for the fam (ie Mother of bride, mother of groom, yada yada yaa) and who knows? I <3 tulle!!! Maybe some tulle roses? Yeah, love them too... tulle tulle tulle!
- A GARTER SET!! (from etsy of course) its PINK! (just for fun) and is adorned with, you guessed it! STARFISH! <3 ($20, I could've got a cheaper uglier one from ebay but since I saved so much money on the above items I figured I'd splurge, yes $20 is a splurge for this thrifty lady!)
-A ring shell... let me explain... its a shell that has a closure.. like a little make up compact but made out of a shell to hold our wedding rings! its adorable! and from the same seller as the garter so she offered to customize it a bit for me and refunded some shipping costs. <3 etsy! ($15 also a splurge, mike and i have all kinds of trinket boxes and such but this one was just too cute)
-YESS my something BLUE! You'll never guess what it is, I dare you... *insert guess here* ... wrong!! :-P But I'll tell you anyway... I got underwear (from etsy) that say "Mrs.Hartman" in blue!!! (I don't disclose my underwear prices. lol)
-Stuff to make a fascinator birdcage veil... I already had the netting... I just bought a rose and some baby's breath from a.c.moore. That is an in-progess project, the flower adorned with starfish is complete, with help from Ms. Malkemes. I just need to pick up a hair comb then I can make the veil part.

My newest obsession stems from an etsy/ebay/google search for "opal wedding bands".... Although I already purchased a wedding band from ebay I found an opal wedding band... *drool*

this could also be my something blue... unfortunately the only size available is an 8. Well, that's double my ring size... Yes, I'm a 4. Call me tiny-finger-tara... it is rediculously hard to find opal rings in a size 4. *sigh* This ring is $15... why oh why can't we all have tiny fingers like tara?!

Also, my "flower flavor of the week." Well, roses are a must for our wedding.. I LOVE roses... the accompanying flowers have yet to be determined. This week the flavor is Daisies!!!

this is my ultimate inspiration bouquet!!! I love the reds and pinks and the baby's breath!! <3 So in love with this.. I hope I can recreate it, I would swap the pink roses out for peach roses and add... yes yes I know its a little predictable at this point, starfish! Peach roses were my nana's favorite! and they also match the starfish :-) looove it

1 song.

2010-02-18T18:14:00.001-08:00

There is one song and one song only that I love on the radio right now and its Matisyahu "one day"

Now let me give you some background on this awesome artist. He is an orth0dox, jewish, reggae-singer who beatboxes.

youtube him, please. He's amazing.

I've seen him 4 times in concert I believe... Twice at Bonnaroo, once with 311 and once somewhere else... Anyway... he's amazing and I think you should all fall in love with him too.

Mad props to Matisyahu, doin' his own thing and being amazing at it. I love him, his music, his lyrics... he's amazing!!!!!!!! ANND I'm so glad they interupt the Miley and Lady Gaga with his music, atleast like 3 times during my work day. It really does make things more bearable!!!

Did I ever mention how much I love reggae??? Probably not... but I do, I adore it it makes my heart beat, and my toes tingle and gives me that "just before happy tears" feeling. I want to listen to some marley, some peter tosh or something riiiight now. Thank you Ja for creating reggae. Also, thank you for creating sushi, peaches, carbonated beverages, oreo's, skittles, the ocean, ranch dressing, Michael, Pepito, Thor, Rocky (rest his soul), Gus, Princess, our house and everything in it.. and thank you for helping me find Michael... although the road was long and windy the journey was worth it and to the victor go to spoils or something... Life is good and I am thankful for everything... Especially the 43 degree weather that made me that much more sure winter doesn't last forever and matisyahu, always thank you for matisyahu. <3 oh, and water and sunshine and flowers :-)

very very sad news...

2010-02-12T17:44:00.000-08:00

Something very sad and unexpected happened to my family today... A very good friend of my oldest brother and his wife passed away in her sleep. I hope she did not suffer... she was a very good person... loving and kind, without her I may not have my brother and sister-in-law the way they are today. Please pray for all her family and loved ones... the world will never be the same... we will never forget you. I hope your soul is at peace. The world has been a better place because of you.

rest in peace.

my first tutorial :-)

2010-02-10T13:45:00.001-08:00

...and my first official DIY!

My birdcage veil ;-)

Total cost: about $5

Total labor: About 2 hours (in reality with playing with the dogs, cooking and 1 do-over)Total Actual labor: about 30 mins

Materials....

Needle and thread (already had it...)
Barrette/ hair comb or headband (already had it)
14 x 9 peice of russian netting (e-bay $4)
3 starfish (already had it)
2 pearls (super cheap, already had some though..)
little "mother of pearl" lookin' sea shells (e-bay 100 for $5, I used like 10)
Scissors (hah had them too)
Hot glue gun with glue of course (best $2 I ever spend like 9 years ago)
Gorilla glue (not pictured, $.99) there's glue in that pic. that didn't work. damn you billy mayes.

Instructions
First cut the netting, at first I had a 14 x 14 square... it was just too full for me so I then made it 9 X 14. I also cut the corners off... so the netting shape was like a house with the roof tip cut off.

Thread a need through it, going through each diamond in the netting.

Gather the netting. Hot glue to whatever you're using that's going to hold it in your hair. I'm only wearing mine for the ceremony so I figured whatever I could find in my bag o' tricks was good enough. I found one of these

I hot glued the gathered veil to the top. Tried it on to make sure it was the right length and volume for me..

Then I assembled the starfish, shells and pearls on a nail file... A popsicle stick or a tongue depressor would have been ideal, but we're snowed in... so I improvised.

Finally I hot glued the nail file to the barrette.

TADA!!!

escuse my lack of make-up and my poor poor attempt at an up-do. lol

Snow day!!!

2010-02-10T13:27:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm pretty sure the snow is waist deep now... we went out at noon and I was up just past my knees... Pepito was completely sumberged in snow when he jumped off the porch... and even Thor was up to his chest!!

Weekend recap

2010-02-08T15:50:00.000-08:00

Well, my prayer to Chuck Norris must have worked... because 9:30 am I got a phone call... I was really excited because I thought for sure it was a "don't come into work today call..." BUT I was wrong. It was a "Tara, I'm barfing my brains out please come to work early..." So, I got my little patootie out of bed and drug my tired ass to work. Now, the good part about this was I got out of work before the snow came!! HORRAY! That was my plan all along. So, I lost no hours of work and got to come home early! So Michael, Ryan and I went out to play at Cousins and had some draaaanks. It was a fun evening. The drive home was a big scary... but we made it!

Well, woke up on Saturday morning and had a SERIOUS craving for pizza!! So Mike and I went to the Westy for some grub, delicious, delicious grub. After we got home I hopped on the book of face and sent Channy a message. "Come to the Royals game with me!! One of the players gave me tickets!!!" Well gee, you guys know me I never turn down free tickets to a hockey game!!! So we went, they lost, but it was a good game. I had to explain some of the rules to Chantal lol but we had a lot of fun. Our inner cheerleader always comes out at sporting events, we can't help it! So it was really down to the wire... like 2 mins left in the 3rd and it was 3-2 elmira after the royals some how pulled off a shorthanded goal. They pull their goalie, and are shorthanded again and take like 46 shots on goal in a minute, I swear. STILL LOST.

Well, 3 blue moons to the wind, Chantal did donuts in the Works parking lot, then we met up with Evie and headed to Legends for some draaaaaanks and shots shots shots shots shots!!! What an eventful evening with the Royals it was! I literally have a stiff neck from looking up at these 6'5" guys. The list of drinks that were partying it up in my system included but are not limited to... dirty bong water, miller lite, snake bites, strawberry blonde, red headed sluts, something blue, something green, jager bombs and (this last one is beyond me) a bloody mary.

After the bar we went over to some Royals' house. One of them still had their Christmas tree up... well me being inebriated couldn't stop making fun of the out of season Christmas decor... and I ended up angering some girl... but whatever "Hunny, its FEBRUARY!!!"

Oh yes, the quest for someone's keys... we'll call her "SDC" I won't tell you what it stands for... anyway... at some point in the evening drunk SDC gave her keys to drunk Chantal. We'll keep it at that for the time being. So SDC cannot find her keys. Chantal does not have them... and at this point is sleeping like a baby on the couch. We check her purse and her person... no keys in Chantal's possession. So SDC cannot get home to her kid, the only reason I mention this is because if I had to hear "I just want to see my daughter" one more time I thought my brain might have turned to liquid and drained out my ear, eyes, nose and mouth. So, Evie, probably the nicest girl in the world agrees to take SDC home to ALLENTOWN from Reading. Mind you Ev had already driven from Hamburg, to The Works, to Legends, to Sinking Spring, BACK to Legends and is now going to drive to Allentown and then Hamburg... what a trooper. So the whoooole ride home I had to hear SDC bad mouth Chantal, 2nd in command of my bridal party, over and over again. So I'm biting my lip the entire time trying not to SPAZZ out on this girl for talking shit on my bff. So she's going on and on and on about how Chantal's so irresponsible and "SHE LOST MY KEYS!!" and "I JUST WANT TO SEE MY DAUGHTER!" Here's the kicker.... we get this chick home... and where are her keys? HER BACK POCKET!!!!!!!!!! HER BACK FREAKING POCKET!!!!!! Well, atleast SDC gave Ev $20 for her trouble... but we were like... awe-struck... UN-FREAKING-BELIEVABLE!!!

So the saga's not over mind you.... I lost my phone in all this mess and Chantal lost her keys too. Now, we KNOW they are not in our pockets or in the car... So we have to venture back to Sinking Spring in the morning to retrieve our lost belongings and Chantal's car. Successfully, mind you. Keys and phone were in this kids apartment. Sooo us being the girls we are, being so close to the mall went on a little shopping trip. I'm very proud of myself, I only spent $32 at Victoria's Secret. That's a record for me, believe it or not... this is something hubby seriously undecided about, my addiction to under-things... lol

So, now for the ride home... again, the saga continues, lol. We're cruising along on Rt 61 in Lessport and BAAAAAAANNNNNNGGGGGGG CRASH RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE CLANKING CLUNKING PUTTER PUTTER *car turns off* Well, they say you learn something new everyday... transmission fluid is red?? red. Yes, very very red and you can especially tell that when it is POURING out of the bottom of someone's car onto the snow. Chantal's car looked like it had her montly visitor all over the shoulder of highway. Luckily, her aunt has a tow-thingy and we were in front of Raymour and Flannigan. So we browsed at the expensive furniture we can't afford... before some RUDE ass lady says "Um is your car blocking our entrance?!" I wanted to tell her to shove it... but we just said "no, its on the shoulder..." your prescious entrance is fine you dumb lady. GAH, thanks for caring about our unfortunate situation. PS. Get the stick out of your ass... I know how awesome it is to sell furniture all day, but don't take it out on us, we just want to sit on your overpriced couches instead of standing out in the cold. We ended up sitting in the vestibule for like an hour before they got there... then we had to PUSH THE CAR off the shoulder into the parking lot and get it on this tow-thingy... That took forever. Then we took the car to the garage, where the guy looked at it for a little bit.. apparently its a THOUSAND DOLLAR problem... freaking transmission, poor Channy.

So, then we went over to Foreman's to catch the last 3 quarters of the super bowl. Did I mention I hate football ever? Well, I didn't used to... but I recently developed a distaste for it. I was supposed to go out and visit my college friends in Allentown, but since I got home so late I wouldn't have made it out there til after like, halftime... So I stayed closer to home and enjoyed some famous Gray's buffalo chicken dip mmmmmmm.

So, ever since the snow I've been EXTREMELY cold. I cannot warm up... No matter how much clothing I have on. I took a 45 min scalding hot shower last night and that helped a lot.. but now I'm flipping freezing again. Please spring, hurry up, I hate doing so much laundry!

LAST paragraph, I promise. Mike and I went to see Blue Falls Grove today. <3 ittttt and <3 the lady who is in charge she's such a cute little old lady. And I loved her dogs too!!!! So yes, I did some napkin searching today... because yes, we can BUY napkins for 69 cents, instead of renting them for $1. Which also gives us the option of embroidering a monogram or something on them too! How cute!!!

Never ever ever a dull moment... I stick by that, I always will.

what a day

2010-02-04T17:57:00.000-08:00

Well, I woke up with a horrific migraine at like 7am. Took some advil, didn't help, tried to sleep... took a shower, threw up a little... my mom brought me excedrine migraine... that helped a little. I'm feeling pretty good now. I actually got a lot done today, wedding stuff of course.

I drafted a copy of wedding invites... I guess I can share... :)

I also found my ceremony shoes!!!!! AHHHHH I'm really excited about this. I found them at Macy's for 45 then did some cyber shopping around and got them at BonTon for 23!!! (on my bonton charge... which is nice)

I was looking for ruffle-y shoes, since my dress has some ruffles, which I never thought I would like... ruffles seemed so tacky! Buuuut I'm in love with my dress and I'm in love with these shoes! Now I just have to find some nice red ruffley flats or sandals to wear for the reception. I literally have never been so excited about a shoe purchase in my life. I have a feeling I'm going to have to take these over to Momma's house when they arrive... or I'm surely going to wear them somewhere. <3>

I would like to formally thank Pepito and Thor for keeping me company all day while hubby was at class. What good pups we have... so loyal. :-)

I'm hoping and praying that by some miracle of god that I don't have to work tomorrow... not because I don't want to work... Buuuut because I don't like to drive in the snow. I would now like to take this time to say a prayer to Chuck Norris, please Mr. Norris use your awesome powers to cancel work tomorrow. I will be forever greatful. Thank you, your loyal fan, Tara.

really need to start editing my typos

2010-02-02T16:21:00.001-08:00

So there are a few things on my mind... lol

#1 I always hit "publish," "comment," "send," what have you without proof reading first. I really need to stop that.

#2 Red shoes. Red red shoes. I'm searching high and low for my dream wedding shoes. Red shoes. Red shoes. Red shoes. And by high and low... I mean heels and flats! Ideally, I would like flats... but ideally, I'd be a few inches taller. What a predicament!

#3 Taking pictures of my e-ring! So apparently I didn't get the memo... haha people take a million pics of their rings. So I have a few ideas for mine, I plan on doing this tomorrow before work. Of course... starfish, tie dye, maybe on my crocs lol, with the dogs, on my fav jade plant... any other ideas??

#4 Personalized match boxes. I found an awesome tutorial on making "stickers" with coordinating colors and just cutting and adhering. PERFECT, cheap, and sooo cute. Mike and I talked about having a "cigar bar" which is really going to be a personalized bowl (from etsy of course) with cigars in it. Plus, there will be candles everywhere and some people like to blow them out and relight them when they get bored? I dunno, I'm trying to justify putting in the effort to make them... wait a sec... half my friend smoke cigarettes... perfect. Yes, I think matchbooks are a must. *smirk*

#5 My birdcage veil!! Hmmm do I buy a plain one off etsy and decorate it myself? Or do I just buy the netting off ebay and make my own?? Decisions decisions!! I would like english netting... which is hard to find even on e-bay... hmmm

#6 A basket full of flip flips for guests with achy feet. Hopefully I can find random sizes on super discount for like... a nickle. lol I found another tutorial... guess where?!? I dare you.. guess?!? Weddingbee of course... the bride used shelf paper to make the flip flops match her theme. How stinking cute!?

#7 Well, I just had the cutest idea earlier. I talked it out with Amanda... and what I mean when I say that is... I talked at Amanda and she looked at me confused-like. Then when I stopped babbling and clarified she agreed. Sometimes I just need to verbalize things... then they make sense. So, when the guests come into the reception hall... instead of unleashing 200+ people into the ocean of place cards (on wine bottle corks) I had a stroke of genius! Picture an empty wine bottle, with a cork in it, a-top the cork a number, on the label of the bottle the list of guests at that table! So people come in, find their name on a bottle, with a corresponding corked-number and then go find their table number and sit at their seat with the place card (on a wine cork). Yay or nay?

#8 I don't know who I'm asking questions to again... Well Andrea, of course! So Dear FSIL when you read this post, shoot me a comment or e-mail! haha

#9 I'm STARVING and I forgot to "pack a lunch" so either I have to resort to my emergency work rations... applesauce and macaroni and cheese... or do I dare venture out into the world outside ICO and search for something? *sigh* Anyone, anyone out there? Please bring me a salad, or a chicken Cesar wrap, or some sushi. Thank you.

-Love the Future Mrs. Hartman. ;-*

p.s. I proof read this time.

"The One"

2010-02-01T19:02:00.000-08:00

Ah yes, reference to Andrea's blog here (thegebelys.blogspot.com) on Saturday a failed attempt to bridal shopped due to my awful work schedule ended with the entertainment of me trying on Andrea's dresses. Dress 1: The Crusher! lol definately couldn't breath or move my arms in this dress but it was gorgeous and made me look like I had the tiniest little waist ever!!! Dress 2: Andrea's dress! Loved it, but I didn't feel like "mine" well cause, it wasn't lol. Very gorgeous and I love everything about it except that it just didn't... feel right? Now I know no one reads this damn blog... so its pointless to ask questions to myself... but Know what I mean??

So I wake up Sunday apx 1:30pm... call up mom "hey what ya doing wanna go to lunch?" "lets go to David's bridal call and see how late their open.." Call David's "can you be here by 3?" "sure?" "Mom, we have an appt at 3." "Maybe dad will take us" well yes, daddy played taxi driver for us and I'm glad he did.

Dress #1 very similar to my maggie sottero hampton I adore(d) so much... Love(d) it. lol
Dress #2 love(d) it now its between 1 and 2
Dress #3 love(d) but still ike 1 and 2 better
Dress #4 ehhhh not so much
Dress #5, 6, 7 ehhh not as much as I love(d) #1!
Dress #8 we have a contender!!!
Dress #9 doesnt even compare to 1 or 8

Try them on again...
#1 still love it... but ehhh
#8 this time in a 2 (not a 4) with a birdcage veil and pearls. Holy crap. I love this dress. But its nothing like anything I pictured...

Soo... when thinking of my "dream dress" 3 things came to mind... pick up skirt, lace up back, sweet heart neckline.... which lead me to think that "maggie sottero- hampton or andrea" were the right dress for me. Now, I'm more than a "hippie at heart" I'm a straight up tie-dye, croc wearing, composting, gardening, enviro-science, roll in the dirt, barefoot, rock-climbing fool. So, here I am trying on dresses and I'm trying on pick up skirts with intricate beading and trumpet dresses, ones with broaches and lace and yada yada yaaaa.... Well, they were all gorgeous and they all looked gorgeous on but I felt like a Barbie... and last time I checked Matel hasn't come out with dirt-worshipper Barbie! So I try on all these dresses and loved them all but they just weren't for me. Then, a light came shining down from the heavens *aaahhhhhhh* and God's finger pointed to this Galina halter on the sale rack (dress #8). Well thats not really what happened... but it was in the mix of dresses madre and I had picked up to try on at first. So I tried it on, while my mom was in the bathroom... oddly enough I didn't need any help with this one... So I step out of the dressing room... take a look and think "wtf? this dress is nothing like anything I wanted... but I freaking love it!" I kept that dress on for a while... everyone around me agreed it looked great. I had a 4 at first... then switched to a 2 (which still needs to be taken in.) The girls surrounding me seems irrirated to say the least... I heard the one say something under her breath about my "measurements." Considering I'm a D cup and a size 2, I don't blame her lol. Plus, I liked every dress I tried on... the 3 girls surrounding me hated everything they put on. Anyway! I loved it, but wasn't so sure about buying it immediately... so then I asked for a birdcage veil and instantly fell. in. love. Again with the lights shining down from heaven... ahhhhhhhhhh! Then, I asked the seemstress to show me how it would look bustled, and I fell in love even more. Then of course, the final touch a string of pearls! *ahhHhhhh* I felt gorgeous, and I felt like myself! So I called FSIL and txted her a picture for reassurance. Also, since my dad was playing "taxi driver" and took mom and I there I summoned him and made him come look at the dress. At this point, mom, dad and the lady who was helping us were crying. I'll admit I teared up when I saw dad reach for the tissue. So we bought the dress! With 17 months to go. Fiance gave me a blank check (what a lovely future husband) since he knew I wouldn't spend a penny over our budget, I'm just good like that. Now that's trust... give your fiance a blank check to go wedding dress shopping? What a perfect future husband. I can't wait for everyone to see ittttttt.....

Its a the parent's house so I don't put it on and walk around in it. LoL I know I would have that problem... just like I did with the wedding band. So yay! bought a dress, that I love and wasn't too expensive. I'm a happy bride :-)

and now.... we wait. *sigh*

looking for inspiration...

2010-01-30T07:13:00.000-08:00

My mind is bustling with a million ideas and thought and DYI projects for this wedding... but I can't seem to focus long enough to work on one particular thing right now. I scoured photo printing websites for a different save the date design than the one I already created on snapfish.com but I still like my original one best. Then, I searched for wedding invitation inspiration. Google is my friend. I have this gorgeous DYI idea in my head... but it seems so far out of reach. I need some colored pencils so I can do some sketches. What else have I done today? Posted a thread on weddingbee to see if I'm the only person actually crazy enough to grow her own flowers... which entails making all the centerpeices and bouquets, for her own wedding. So far, yes, I am the only one crazy enough.

Back to invites... I'm imagining champagne colored paper with kind of a mother of pearl sheen to it... some red swirly-doos in the top left corner and in the botton left corner... a picture of 2 champagne flutes on the beach with a dark red lily lain between them, and a starfish off in the distance. We'll see. I know I have resources I can utilize (i.e. graphic designer friends) but at the same time I really really really want to do it myself. I have that problem though... I mean, I've planned plenty of events in the past where I took A LOT of little projects on myself and its those little projects that keep me sane. Focusing on the details makes me less stressed out about the obvious horror stories of nightmare weddings.... is it going to rain? will a tree get struck by lightning and level the reception hall? will a plague of locusts inevitably eat my whole crop of wedding flowers?! oh god. will mike leave me at the alter? will I wake up with some god awful rash all over my body? PIMPLES? sunburn? tragic death in the family? hurricanes?! Oh god oh god oh god... breathe. for the love of all this is holy woman, breathe!

back to reality... just for a moment, I suppose. The invites... hmmm I know I have plenty of time for all this but I just want to get them done. Perhaps I will start a draft or something today... while I'm ever so bored here at work.

I'm starving, E-Z mac to the rescue!

crud, I have to inspect the fire extinguishers today and make Mr. Brown some labels... crud crud crud... why does my job have to exist on saturdays?! I just want to go try on some dresses!!!! Actually... I just want this dress... *sigh* Maggie Sottero Hampton... you are always on my mind!

The wedding tree!!!!

2010-01-28T17:13:00.000-08:00

I love this idea. Andrea sent this to me shortly after Mike and I got engaged and I just love it. I found this picture on wedding bee and thought i'd post it. This is so much more creative than just doing a guest book!!

The thing that excites me most.... I LOVE DRAWING TREES!!!!!!! :-D

weddingbee!

2010-01-27T19:17:00.000-08:00

thatssss me!

so, as many of these site suggest... make an "inspiration board" in case you lose sight of your original vision...

well there it is!!!

"Champagne and sand" and some romantic reds of course... silly how could I not let myself fall into "red and white" after sporting the hamburg high colors so often and so long. Its really perfect I think... its romantic with the champagnes and reds and its whimsical with the starfish but its sophisticated at the same time... Hmmm... maybe I should be a wedding planner! lol

throat amphibians.

2010-01-24T07:12:00.000-08:00

Ah yes, working 1st shift on a Sunday is not one of my most favorite things in the world but I guess it has its perks? Yes, the overtime is very nice especially with the ever surmounting costs of wedding planning but, I would much rather be cuddled up in bed with my boys. Its extremely boring here on the weekends... there are normally about 15 machines running on a normal day. Today, there are 4. I arrived here at 8:45am which is actually really late for me to get here considering my shift was techincally supposed to start at 7. No big deal though, since its so rediculously slow around here no one really cares when I come or go, as long as at some point I test some samples... and perhaps answer the phone when the airmilling supervisor calls. I am much more tired than I normally am while working a very boring 1st shift... I think I might be coming down with something. There is definitely a frog in my throat. Actually, whatever this amphibian is, it is much larger than a frog. I sound awful enough that when I had to page Stewie he thought, I was a man. So, with it being so incredibly slow and boring I went out to my car and grabbed a pillow and a blanket, laid down in my office on the floor on a drum liner and tried to take a nap... Well aparently the ever growing critter in my throat didn't agree with this decision because as soon as my head hit the pillow I coughed up not 1 lung, but 2. I actually might have coughed up a few other people's lung as well. I'm really at a loss here... Ah yes, on top of coughing up numerous lungs... its strange the noises you hear at work when you're trying to fall assleep... I mean, this is a pretty noisy place and I'm comfortable with that granted I've been working here for over a year... But as soon as my head hit that pillow I heard all kinds of noises... imaginary foot steps, the tick tock on the clock that strangely enough I have NEVER heard before after spending a gagillion hours here.

I would now like to take the time to express my disapproval of that stupid H1N1 rap... Maybe you know what I'm talking about... in case you don't... I will now take a moment to search via youtube and find a link.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuITsj22QWQ
Now, I don't know how many of you listen to the radio all day at work... but I do. This FLIPPIN ad is on like 15 times a day and its just awful awful awful. So awful I, believe it or not, lost sleep over it. There must be some kind of subliminal messaging or brainwashing mechanism involved with this ad because this damn song was stuck in my head for hours. I tried everything to fall assleep!!! The final combo that actually worked was a benadryl, tylenol PM combo and the comcast hip hop music channel. Truly trechorous torture it was. Over and over again in my head... "stop h1n1 stop h1n1 stop stop... i scrub my hands wash them all the time and i scrub everything thats mind in an effort to stop all these germs around me..." AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL GAHHHHHHHHHHH I would've chopped my ears off or something but it was so imbedded in my brain by the time I got around to it that I was nearly on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Ah yes, 1st shift on a Sunday... no facebook at work... *sigh* I'm honestly really upset about it. Yes, I know its jsut facebook but man... I feel lost. When I used to get bored I could just go on there and look at pictures of Mike and the dogs and remember that yes, I do indeed have a life ourside of ICO Polymers. I feel out of touch with the world and I just can't seem to bring myself to waste any of my time not spent at work to fit in some quality facebook stalking time.

Ah ya know what's really buggin' the crud out of me???? I've gotten like 15 paper cuts in the past 2 days. What the frick is that about?!?! Its just so odd... ya know, I went probably like, a month without getting a paper cut now my poor hands feel like poor Edward Scissorhands' face.

Maybe I'll try that nap out again... I'm so so sleepy. Maybe I shouldn't have waited to get that 2nd wind last night... It was like 8pm and I was ready for bed... but I trooped it out with the boys and stayed out til 2am anyway. What a fool! Actually, time well spent, I love Cousin's nights with the guys eventhough I am permanently Francis' punching bag. I guess its better to be tired and miserable at work because I was out having a good time last night than missing out on all the fun and being tired and miserable at work anyway. I really miss Mike, the pups and the dogs right now :( bummer.

I've noticed I'm much more likely to break out into tears when I haven't had much sleep... over little things to. I was reading Andrea's blog and watched that silly video of Pepito, Thor and Katy... and it made me cry! Why?? No idea really... maybe its just that damn cute. Like peewee hockey, that always gets me teary eyed. Oh god, I'm going to be a hysterical mess at the wedding. Someone might need to slap me or something!

Well, maybe I'll do some window shopping on etsy... Andrea always gives me such good ideas!

Sand and Champagne

2010-01-18T19:00:00.000-08:00

Horrray!!! So, Kristi a very good friend of ours sent me a terrific website with all kinds of neat little favors and what not on it... I found sooo many ideas!!!

I MUST MUST MUST order the champagne bubbles "bubbly" for everyone!

Also, I have the "troops" rounding up wine corks for me so I can make our very own wine cork place card holders. I also though the shell holders would be more appropriate for our underaged guests!

I loooove the idea of the little shells and the votive candles... so for practically FREE we can collect baby food jars, fill with sand and shells and insert a votive candle! Adorable decoration and cute little favor for the guests as well. Top off with some ribbon and rafia howwww adorable!!

I love this idea!!! <3>

full of news...

2010-01-12T15:57:00.000-08:00

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34824610/ns/technology_and_science-science/?GT1=43001
a slug that can produce chlorophyll!!!!!!!!?!?!?! How freaking cool is that? Call me nerdy, but this could be our solution to the energy crisis. Someone better get on that.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34829978/ns/world_news-americas/?GT1=43001
Unfortunately, in other news, a 7.0 quake hit Haiti today followed by two large aftershocks of about 5.o... the death toll is predicted to be immense, hospitals crumbled to the ground. The country is covered in dust... My prayers are with the country and everyone of their inhabitants' family and friends. Haiti is a beautiful country rich in biodiversity and a portion of their income is based on eco-tourism... Hopefully this quake does not push their status further into impoverished that before.

In less, international science related news... the cake topper came in the mail today and its gorgeous, I absolutely love it. In other more serious and saddening "mail" news Rocky's memorial stone came in the mail yesterday.. I caught myself hugging and holding it like a child today, only for a moment, I swear... *sigh* I miss my little Rockypoo...

Sweat related news... I did some working out today! Julianne's Cardio Ballroom dancing totally kicked my ass. I had to pause the hour long dvd for a few minutes to catch my breath. This left my muscles crawling!!! Thank you amazon.com http://www.amazon.com/Dance-Julianne-Cardio-Ballroom-Hough/dp/B002LSI1GY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1263341078&sr=8-1

Also, yesterday we finalized our "wedding party" :-) there will be 5 bridesmaids and 5 groomsmen... I don't know what exactly the etiquette is regarding asking the remaining 3 lovely ladies to be in the wedding... but Im very excited to have my "sisters" by my side!!! The MOH's have already been alerted, my Burkert sista's from another mista's. <3 Along with this, we've started drafting the guest list... we have a lot more guests that I had anticipated... we're looking at about 200 (so far).

In other wedding related news... I have the sweetest idea for the numbers for the tables. Now, I know there are only a handful of people who read this... Michael, Andrea and my mother are pretty much the only ones I'm aware of so I'm going to share the secret. *shhh* I've come to terms with the fact that, although the dogs are very much a part of our family, they will not be able to be present at the ceremony, sadly. However, I've been searching for a way to incorporate the little mutts somehow. In the shower yesterday, it finally hit me!!!! How adorable would it be to dress the pups up in "formal attire" (bow ties and flowers for the boys and girls respectively) and take their picture with an oversized styrofoam and/or cardboard number decorated appropriately to coordinate with the theme of the wedding?? Now, since everyone in the bridal party has puppies what could be better than having "dogs of the bridal party showcase"?!?! Oh not to mention, the dogs in the family/bridal party are FLIPPING ADORABLE and a lovely mix of big/small/male/female. I think it will really be adorable. One thing I've had in mind for all the tables is that I don't want them to look exactly alike. I'm not a very "uniform" person... I'm all for the "whimsy" in things... I also have started drafting a poem... Andrea gave me the idea! What a helpful FSIL! :-) I was sincerely lacking creativity last night and I came up with a few stanza's... Michael thinks its cute so far. I also would like him to contribute a few lines... so it will really be something special. :-) 1 more thing before I go!!! The "coordinator" of Blue Falls Grove http://www.bluefallsgrove.com/ has officially "pencilled" us in for June 25th 2011! I don't want anything to be cliche about this wedding... except, of course, the fact that it is, in fact, in the most popular wedding month, but that's it! I PROMISE!! I'm really getting very excited about this whole thing... I've also come to terms with the fact that Mike doesn't really ever want to talk about anything wedding related especially on the phone, or at the bar, or at home... or anywhere else really. Haha. So I'm just going to dive into this! Some of you may know that I had an AMAZING job my senior year in college as a program coordinator which, HIZZAH! I got to plan events for an entire year!! So I've got some experience with this whole "coordinating" and "deligating" and OF COURSE "not forgetting any little detail!" Plus, I have an amazing wedding party, and amazing family, soon to be family, and lots of people with experience under their belt. This is going to be entirely too much fun. :-)

So all good news, bad news, sad news, wedding news aside... I hope everyone has a lovely Tuesday. Three more days til the weekend!

Becky Pets a Dog

2010-01-10T20:10:00.000-08:00

Becky, deathly afraid of dogs, came for a visit last night. Shet pet Thor, the 100lb black mutt. Becky, I <3 you!!!

Thank you antibiotics!!!

2010-01-07T19:46:00.000-08:00

So, this past week I've had the "pleasure" of hosting some infections... sinus and ear to be exact. I woke up Sunday morning and pretty much couldn't stand, or keep much down... thank you middle ear infection. I also couldn't breath and my face hurt like I had been attacked. So a few days off from work, one miserable day back at work... $30 at the doctor, $71 at the pharmacist and 2 sick days later I'm feeling a-ok! I am blaming these illnesses on Eric Francis. Why you ask?!?! Well thank you Mr. Francis for a lovely "snow plowing" i.e. plowing snow into my face numerous times throughout the evening that was the fantastic Becker-Mitten new years eve party!!! So, we started out the new year at the BM's. It was a joyous, drunken, gluttonous debachery. lol I loved every fun filled snow-angel and sip of champagne and of course, ever kiss from Michael and god aweful picture. I think we truely rang in the new year in style, party hats and all!! Here's to a happy 2010 full of wedding planning!!!

re-cap, 09

2009-12-28T13:17:00.000-08:00

Well, I'd have to say 2009 was hands down, the best year ever. The photo book I made Michael really did a good job at recapping the wonderful 365 days of joy but I'll attempt to do it in words as well.
The day after Mike and I first hung out the day after Christmas 2008... That's when my life really fell into place... The days after Christmas before New Years I absolutely fell in love... of course I didn't say anything yet, but I know we both knew. We spend days and days just telling stories about our lives, sharing pictures and nick knacks, treasures, shells, pottery shards, stuff that wouldn't have meant anything to some people meant the world to us. It was very refreshing to finally find someone who had most of the same values and qualities as I do... generous but frugal, adventurous and prepared, smart and silly. Although we couldn't tell my brother or half of Mike's friends for fear of poor Mike getting his ass kicked... we saw each other everyday. Michael took care of me when I was sick... we watched movies with my mom, we drank wine, we had a lot of fun...
Then, we welcomed our first "child" together.. Pepito. Now, Mike and I had not planned on getting a puppy "together" but I had been begging my mother for months about getting a puppy. So I put in an application for this little guy who has the saddest story to tell... Pepito has 2 brothers and 3 sisters... Unfortunately some ****head decided that it would be a good idea to get rid of the puppies by putting them in a burlap sack with rocks and throwing them into a lake... Pepito's sisters didn't make it :-(. Luckily the 3 boys did. I put in an application for any of them, Pep, Ponch and Patch and Beth matched me with Pep because he was the underdog of the three and she thought he would love my ferrets. So the morning of Jan 10th we drove out to Mount Bethel to retrieve our little bundle of joy... I stress LITTLE, he was only 5 pounds!!! So while I went to work, Michael took Pepito everywhere with him... he met his cousins Katy and Calie, his aunts Lily and Jessie, his uncle Bear of course... also Archie... his kitten friends Pumpkin, Cali and Fiona and his ferret friends Rocky, Gus, Princess, and Riki! We trained him and loved him as much as any two new happy parents could of course.
Shortly after our new arrival Mike and I decided that it was too damn cold in PA and we needed a vacation! So, we planned a cruise in April!! We drove to Miami, which for most couples would be a pretty awful experience but it was rather enjoyable for us. Mike did nearly all the driving, and I did a lot of sleeping but we also had a lot of really fun conversations... plus we got to stop in St. Augustine and play on the beach for a little bit. We had the most amazing time on our cruise... everyone thought we were newlyweds and we hadn't even been dating for 4 months. We did everything and anything we possibly could... kayaking, snorkeling, parasailing, rock climbing, beach lounging, buffet eating, we dressed up, we didn't get dressed at all, we ate, we slept, we drank, we laughed, we smoked cigars, it felt like a honeymoon! :-) the only bad part about the cruise was it had to end! AHHH Then back to work...
Ah yes, before we left on this cruise we had done some house hunting. Of course people thought we were crazy.. but I knew I wanted to live with Michael, we wanted a place to call our own... to take all our treasures out of boxes and display them proudly all over the living room... So we hunted, we put in 2 offers on 2 houses that we're glad we didn't get after all. The whole experience was a little stressful for me... so I was pretty mad at Mike when we didn't get the 2nd house. So I told him I wasn't going to go look at ANY OTHER houses until he KNEW that this was the house he wanted to spend the rest of our lives in... Well, low and behold, a few days later our realtor called Mike with a new listing, its first day on the market. So Michael went to take a look at 9am and left me and the pup at home. About an hour later, I was told I needed to come see the house. Reluctantly, I agreed... despite the fact I thought I was in for more heartache and let-down. So, my mom, Michael and I went to see the little brick cape cod on Clayton Ave. We closed about a month later, June 30th, 2009. We painted, and moved, a decorated and spent our first night in our new house on July 4th... how fitting INDEPENDENCE DAY!!! Haha.
Our next big milestone was our 2nd pup, Thor, the 95lb black lab/horse/bear/goat mix from Bloomsburg. Thor arrived on Aug 2, my 23 birthday, what a great present! What a destructive and adorable addition to our family. Pepito and Thor are the best of friends.. Pito will jump on poor Thor's head and bite his paws and Thor doesn't seem to mind at all. They're a good pair. Ah yes, the list of things that Thor has eaten grows by the day... a plate of brownies, a jar of Hershey kisses (which made Thor poo shiny golden nuggets that sparkled in the yard...), a $90 Ralph Lauren pump (fortunately I found the same pair, online on sale for 40... my favorite shoes!), Mike's photo book, a box of chalk, a tube of furo-vite, wrapping paper, Christmas ornaments, and god only knows what else he destroyed and left no evidence of... Ohhhh Thor.
1 last milestone for the year, that I originally forgot about when first posting this blog... Michael started college!!!!! He's going for his associates in Mechanical Engineering at Penn State Berks right now... I hope that he changes his mind and goes for his Bachelor's but, as long as he's happy I'm happy. He's doing very well! He completely his first semester successfully! 1 down, 3 to go. I'm so proud of him... it takes a lot of guts to go back to school when you're not old enough to be "a non-traditional" student but you're too old to go to frat parties. I don't think he realizes just how proud of him I am... but I really really am sooo proud of my hunny! <3
A few random trips were scattered in there somewhere Assateague Island, Maryland was a BLAST. I hope we do this every year. I loved every second of it... even though I got eaten alive. We went to MD to help Ben and Jackie move... we went to Delaware with Kristi and Jon... a hike to the pinnacle with puppy Pito, a Flyers game, many Royals games, many man trips to Cousins, the Westy, Pappy T's, even some bowling, and many dinner dates later... brings us to our first Christmas.
Mike proposed on Dec 13th :-) making me the happiest most excited girl in the world... Then unfortunately, my baby ferret Rocky passed away on Dec 20th... but the days go on, Christmas was sure to follow, as it did. It was nice to spend the days with our families. I couldn't ask for a better family to marry into. They're amazing... I've only met them all a few times yet they gave me the PERFECT gifts that I LOOOVE every single one of. It was a great Christmas.
Sadly, all good things come to an end and it back to work for a 3 day week then, New Years!!! I'm really excited to see what this new year will bring! I can't imagine it being more full of excitement then 09 but hey, I could be wrong... We could hit the lottery or something, maybe find some amazing dream job... I guess we'll have to wait and see.
I do know one thing though, as long as I have Mike, anything is possible. Its just been such a year of growth and learning for me... everything I thought I knew about love was, completely wrong. Some people say that love is all you need, but I've come to learn that love is just one of the many things you need to make a relationship work... compromise, maturity, understanding, intelligence, humour just to name a few. A few years back I thought the only thing you needed to "be in love" was just to love someone and have them love you in return. Turns out that no matter how much someone loves you, if they're some asshole idiot who takes you for granted and treats you like dirt than you need more than love. That combination only makes misery... which is a feeling I had closely associated with love. So here's to all those assholes! Thanks for nothing.
I love you Michael, you're the greatest thing that's ever happened to me... I've had a lot of bad experiences with men and you have completely undone all the damage I thought was irreparable. Maybe I don't deserve you, but I am damn happy and very proud to have you. <333 Thank you for making this the best year of my life... and here's to many many more!

beating myself up...

2009-12-22T17:38:00.000-08:00

Today has been very... trying, to say the least. There is just something about Tuesdays that I always despise... and eventhough I only have 1 more day of work left before I get to spend the long Christmas weekend with Michael, the dogs and our families I am just absolutely miserable beyond belief today. Maybe its because Michael woke me up entirely too last to even get a shower before work... maybe I'm in the anger phase of accepting Rocky's death... maybe its just the stress of it all but I've never want to STRANGLE EVERYONE SO BAD! I just want to scream at the top of my lungs as loud as I possibly can.... just AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! The grimmace on my face does not even begin to scratch the surface of the rage I'm feeling right now. My heart is beating a mile a minute and my brain isn't working at all. Work is nearly impossible. I'm a lab tech, I test lab samples. That's all I do, that's what I get paid to do and for some reason today, I just cannot come to terms with that. Everytime I see a sample in my sample bin I feel like God himself is torturing me somehow. I. just. want. to. scream. Now I'm nearly in tears just thinking about all the emotions I'm feeling right now that I'm unable to express. There's just no logical way to express such anger. I don't believe I've ever been so enraged, at all. Everyone is my enemy today.. even the bastards that gave me perfect little thoughtful Christmas presents, the DJ on B104 who's playing my favorite song, Mike who only wants to help, everyone working here right now. What is this lump in my throat? Why are these tears in my eyes? 2 more days til Christmas and I feel so awful I could curb stomp Santa Claus himself. There's clearly something wrong with me... a bad chord in my head strummed the wrong way causing imminent catastrophe. I feel like a child in who can't get the toy they want, kicking and screaming, red in the face, tears streaming down, making a total fool out of oneself, over what? I just want to go home, and cry for days... forget Christmas, forget New Years... I don't want my presents. I just want to wallow in my own self-pity. I am an empty shell of what I once was... my heart's broken in a million peices, I am numb to the world. Lock me away, I feel as though I don't deserve anything I have... my job, my house, my fiance, this ring, my dogs, my ferrets who are still alive... I don't deserve a damn thing. I just can't seem to snap out of this, I know its only been 2 days but how long does the pain last? How long can I blame myself? How long can I beat myself up before there's nothing left of me? How long? How long can I beat myself up? How long can I bring myself down?

Rocky Raccoon...

2009-12-21T15:27:00.000-08:00

Now somewhere in the black mining hills of Dakota
There lived a young boy named Rocky Raccoon
And one day his woman ran off with another guy
Hit young Rocky in the eye Rocky didn't like that
He said I'm gonna get that boy
So one day he walked into town
Booked himself a room in the local saloon.

Rocky Raccoon checked into his room
Only to find Gideon's bible
Rocky had come equipped with a gun
To shoot off the legs of his rival
His rival it seems had broken his dreams
By stealing the girl of his fancy.
Her name was Magil and she called herself Lil
But everyone knew her as Nancy.
Now she and her man who called himself Dan
Were in the next room at the hoedown
Rocky burst in and grinning a grin
He said Danny boy this is a showdown
But Daniel was hot-he drew first and shot
And Rocky collapsed in the corner.

The doctor came in stinking of gin
And proceeded to lie on the table
He said Rocky you met your match
And Rocky said, Doc it's only a scratch
And I'll be better I'll be better doc as soon as I am able.

Now Rocky Raccoon he fell back in his room
Only to find Gideon's bible
A Gideon checked out and he left it no doubt
To help with good Rocky's revival.

My favorite Beatles song... inspired the name of my little Rocky nearly 3 years ago. When my mom and I went to pick Rocky out from the petstore, he was the tiniest little guy there and all the larger ferrets wouldn't let poor Rocky get to the food dish. How could I resist? I took my little runt home... its sad to think that the first days I spent with Rocky were very much like his last... Rocky was so tiny and frail when he first set foot into the Beretsky family... I would constantly check on the little tyke to make sure he was still breathing. Rocky had a great life. He had many ferret friends, and adventures. I never met an animal or a person who didn't love Rocky and who Rocky didn't love in return... except that time he tried to eat my hamster dizzy lizzy. Rocky spent most of his life in Kutztown in my smelly cruddy little Cliff's house, he also stayed with Emily, the Beretsky and finally, 9 Clayton ave. Rocky had frequent visitors and long-time friends... a kitty named pounce, a pitbull named Roxy, a boxer name Cleo, his uncle Bear the collie, Riki, Rosco, Andre, Cody, Pippin, Daisy, Gus-gus, Sushi, Gus and Princess, his ferret friends... Unfortunately, Rocky came down with an unknown condition which caused him to become severely anemic... dispite mommy and daddy's efforts Rocky passed away early yesterday morning in his sleep. I am absolutely devestated. Rocky and I were two peas in a pod... he went everywhere with me... Punkin' Chunkin' contests, the SUB, Weis, Geology Club, the green house, the eco plot... my fovrite memory of Rocky is when the ice-storm hit Kutztown a few years back... Rocky and Riki were at 600S with me and they had the opportunity to go "sledding" down the front yard. What a site to see these two... sliding down the ice, they loved every second of it.

Rocky was your typical ferret... he liked to eat kitten food and puppy food, hoard pizza crust, makes nests out of random paper products lying around the house, steal socks, chew on my crocs, crawl in my drawers, climb his cage, scale the screens on the windows, chase the vacuum cleaner, give ferret kisses, play with pitbulls, chase hamsters, dig in the dirt, poop in front of doors, hide in the closet, eat kellie's birthday gag-gift (a large rubber dildo)... Rocky was always up to something... His favorite place was under my sweatshirt or in my coat pocket, cleverly named the Rocket Pocket. There are so many memories I have of the little guy... He was my best friend during a part of my life where I was struggling with relationships, taking on too much responsibility, spreading myself too thin, graduting college, moving across the country, moving back, finding the love of my life, buying a house, and getting engaged. There's nothing that could cheer me up when I was at my lowest like an arm full of ferrets. He was more than a stinky weasel he was a companion I will never forget. Perhaps Rocky had been sick all along... it seems as though as soon as he knew I had a good man to take care of me he no longer had to protect me, and he gave up fighting... One week after Michael and I got engaged one of the saddest days in my life occurred. There's a theory that when good things happen, bad things follow and vice versa, maybe it was just the vicious circle that is life. I don't think I've ever cried so much as I did yesterday. Its hard to lose anything, a pet, a loved one... but I have never lost anything that was in my care. Rocky's life was in my hands and there was nothing I could do to help. I was powerless and that's what hurts the most. Some people have said that "well, he's just a ferret"... well, a lot has changed in my life since Rocky first appeared... he was the only constant thing I had to hold on to for over 2 years. He was, my Rock. No matter how bad things got, Rocky was always there. I wish there was a way to thank him... but I think he understood. Rocky was always good at licking away my tears and getting me out of bed by attempting to drag important items under my dresser, or knocking over glasses of water... We all miss you Rocky.. your brother and sister especially. They've been looking for you and you are no where to be found. They're lost without you... you're the one who taught them all the good hiding places, and that when you stand up on your hind legs mommy gives you a treat.

I fear I didn't do enough and at the same time I fear I did too much... I tried as hard as I could to keep the little guy alive, did I prolong his suffering? There are a million questions I can ask myself and none of them make me feel any better... When summer comes I hope to plant a tree in Rocky's name where we laid him to rest on Sunday... perhaps a Ginko tree, so we will never forget...

Rest in peace baby boy... you are very loved. I'm sure there are plenty of pens, toothbrushes, pizza crusts, styrofoam plates, socks, notebooks, hair brushes, jingley balls, and anything else your little heart desires up in ferret heaven. Thank you for being part of my life and always making me smile. You truly are a little ferret angel. <3

and the planning begins...

2009-12-16T19:43:00.000-08:00

One thing I'm dead set on doing with the help of my green-thumbed mother and aunts of course is growing my own flowers for centerpieces and possibly bouquets. Thank god other people have blogs!!!

http://growflowers.blogspot.com/

http://blog.amystewart.com/wedding.html

love it!!!!

centerpieces of live flowers, in dirt, are probably going to be the name of the game. I truly hate to kill things... especially helpless little beautiful blossoms!!! I'm thinking... an "ecclectic" (michael hates this word) assortment of found pots at flea markets and auctions would be very whimisical. Throw in some home grown flowers and top off the dirt with glass marbles and maybe a starfish or two for good luck ;-) just screams gorgeous to me... tell me if i'm wrong??? Who wouldn't want to take home some beautiful plants to grow for a few months after our wedding and have a lovely pot to remember the occasion forever!? I know I would! :-)

I also will be recruiting my life long friend Amanda to take our wedding pictures. This girl has had a camera attached to her hand since middle school. Not only do I love her, she's amazing! Also, I think we will be asking Jon (kristi's boyfriend) to work his camera magic on our special day.

Now all we need is a big backyard and all the fixins' 1 step at a time of course.

Engagement excitement!!!!

2009-12-15T14:51:00.000-08:00

So its not very often I update this thing... I spend too much time playing useless games on facebook while I'm at work. But something happened this weekend that is just beyond too exciting to contain myself!!!

Michael proposed to me Sunday morning! There's kind of a build up to the story that I will now share.... So, for Christmas I made Michael a photo book of our "first year" on Snapfish. It came in the mail last week so I wrapped it and put it under the tree. Michael and I went out Saturday evening to watch the Flyers at Cousins (where we first 'hung out' the day after Christmas 1 year ago). So I wasn't feeling very well and the alcohol hit me harder than it should have.... i.e. I was plastered. So we return to 9 Clayton Ave. to find that the dogs have completely destroyed the presents under the tree, wrapping paper everywhere causing me to have a drunken nervous breakdown, of course. LUCKILY the book that took me like 3 weeks to put together only has minor dog-damage to one corner of it. Mike thinks it "adds character." Which, in a way is true... the dogs have shown their destruction in every inch of our house, why not my Christmas present to Mike? So, I wake up in the morning... feeling just aweful. I truly was a pitiful wreck. So we paged through the photo book together as I pouted and sniffled and coughed, pitifully and then Mike said that it was only fair that since he got his present early, I should get mine. So, he disappears and reappears and hands me a beautifully wrapped box with a bow on it. Of course, deep down I was HOPING I knew what it was... But Mike's pretty slick and I thought maybe he was going to pull a fast one on me and in this tiny little box could've been a number of random tiny things... But after it took me 15 mins to remove the bow and wrapping paper I saw the box was in fact from Murphy's! AHH THEN I OPENED THE BOX to see the shiniest most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life... So, now I'm almost crying and Mike asked "Hunny will you marry me?" Which prompted a quick scolding from me.. "Do you even have to ask!!" It was absolutely perfect... Regardless of the sniffles and the sore throat and the dogs destroying his surprise... it was perfect. I couldn't think of any better place for him to propose other than the house we love so much, in our bed, with our dogs on a lazy lazy Sunday... all cuddled up under the covers on a cold December morning. :-)

My only regret... ordering our Christmas cards last week! I could've been sporting this beautiful three-stone wonder in all our Christmas pictures... Still though, since I plan on ordering another photo book in the first place... I might as well tack on the pictures of the ring and some pictures from Gina's on Christmas Eve and Alice's on Christmas day... and of course Ben and Jackie's on New Years. So then, the book will REALLY be our WHOLE first year... no exclusions!

So many fantastic things have happened this year, its really hard to imagine that this whole thing started with a mass "merry christmas" text message to everyone in the phone... which luckily included Michael! :-) I love the holidays!!! Actually, I love everyday!!! And really... the best is yet to come :-)

We've decided that we will officially tie the knot June 2011, the color scheme is champagne and cranberry (very romantic!)... it will be an outdoor wedding with a "subtle beach theme" and we already found a cake topper!!! :-) and of course I already have a "style" of dress I'll be looking for (not anytime soon of course) but if I happen to stumble upon a bargain I might snatch something up!

late nights.

2009-11-17T23:49:00.000-08:00

There comes a time in a second-shifter's life where enough is enough. Its nearly 3am and not only am I wide awake, but I have a margarita. *sigh* what is my life amounting to? Maybe it wouldn't seem so desperate and depressing if I were in the living room with the dog with the "hubby" and other dog in bed... Maybe if the roomie were home I might not be feeling like such a "college kid" waiting to grow up. Its not a life everyone can appreciate. I could stay up til 5am without batting an eyelash. To a college kid, I'm god. To a working adult... I'm crazy! *sigh again* Regardless... I'm kicking ASS at Cash Cab right now. Too bad I can't actually win that money. Darn.

I wish I had some rediciously funny story to tell or something exciting about me life... but to be honest its the same shit different day thing we all hear about. I feel mundane.

I've been playing a lot of online facebooky games lately. I feel as though its stifling my creativity. I used to write and.... well think, a lot more than I do. I'm disappointed in a sense, but greatful too. Sometimes thinking isn't the best thing to be doing. Haha, I mean, I work in a factory or christ's sake, I have my college degree and I work in a factory. Its not so bad, I guess. I have insurance I don't ever use?

Oh I hate to sound depressed. I am TRULY kicking ass in cash cab. lol I need to be using my intelligence, istead of wasting it.

All things asside... I love Mike, I love our house and I love the dogs and ferrets. I'm happy I have a decent job... I guess that's really all I have to say for now. I'm disappointed in my lack of creativity in blogging. I apologize.

It is 3am afterall...

its been a while...

2009-09-10T18:55:00.000-07:00

I always forget about this blog... I have a tendency to relieve all my brain "belches" onto my lovely lab partner... Today the topic of conversation was "losing faith in humanity." The recent events that sparked this conversation were
1. someone robbed a dairy queen at gun point and actually held people hostage
2. Michael Vick.

What is the world coming to? Those two things alone really have made me believe the apocolypse is truly upon us. Then again, on that note, I'd like to say that any ailment can be cured, or atleast relieved by simply looking a cute picture of a puppy!

:-)

So now that I'm smiling again maybe I should elaborate a bit more on life the past few weeks. Having a house is wonderful, I love every inch of the entire experience. There's no way to describe it... I truly feel like a "grown up." I think that the most difficult time in someone's life are the transition periods... high school to college, college to "real world"... Highschool to college is easy... you meet your friends, you have a ton of fun, accomplish a lot, learn a ton... ultimately grow. College to "real world" served to be a bit tough for me... jam packed full of heart break, disappointment, unemployment, separation anxiety from my friends... Well, and then... then I met Mike. Everything fell into place, my poor little broken, stomped on, trampled, empty, whatever was left of my heart got a complete overhaul and everything I thought I knew about men went completely out the window. Thank god for that, because I was NOT doing so well when it came to the opposite sex, my endless string of useless relationships was really starting to take it toll when every low life scum bag dick I dated slowly took a piece of my heart with them when they screwed me over... I honestly thought I had nothing left to give. They all tell you, "when you know, you just know" and I thought that for sure that was a crock of steaming shit, because I thought I new everything... However, I'll be damned, because when you know, you just know. And believe it or not this time I KNOW. A lot of people were critical, actually still are critical of my relationship with Mike... We've only been dating 9 months and we already have a house, 2 dogs, a mortgage, we're eachother's beneficiaries for christ sake. This is some serious shit.

not to interrupt my proclamation of love for my boyfriend... but there's some HYSTERICAL shit going on in the lab right now... my mom just called and told me that my phone bill is 100 dollars.... and I used 0 ZERO of 5000 MINUTES HAH! Fuck you AT&T!!! Then amanda got in a fist fight with kevin, now elmer's all up in this shit

OMG. Rediculous!!!!!! NEVER A DULL MOMENT here at ICO.

the forgotten blog...

2009-08-12T15:21:00.000-07:00

Well I certainly have not written for quite some time. Sadly to say, my free time at work has been consumed by Farm Town. And if you don't know, don't ask. haha.

Updates include...
the house is painted, and all decorated... we still need kitchen tile and crown moulding... (a weekend project for my love, of course)...
The housewarming party was fantastic! We have a stocked liquor cabinet to prove it... haha.. Now i'm really excited for the next two house warming parties!!! The Mitten/Becker and the Foreman/Gray!!
Ah yes, which brings me to the newest addition to the family... Thor Thunderwolfe Hartman. The monsterous lovebug big baby that has entered our life and destroyed my favorite shoes. He's really very sweet... but has some separation anxiety issues... as well as some past issues with males... also a gluttony issue... all of which we are lovinly working on. Yes Thor is a handful, but that's okay because he's a handful of love too :-)

The month of August has turned out to be an exciting one thus far... with Ben and Jackie moving on the 1st.. as well as the unforgettable amazing Elton John and Billy Joel concert... <3 Which turned into the 2nd (my 23 b-day!!) Which is when we got our large bundle of joy Thor... Then a week of work... A weekend of play with the dogs, a long walk into town for food at Como, mini-golf with Eric and Melinda... a night out with the ladies which is always eventful and exciting. Id like to throw in that I smoked a cigarette with John Gosselin... who was not quite so interesting OR attractive, for all of your information. Which brings me to the terrorous thunderstorm that is Thor... The list of things that Thor has eaten is as follows...
one plate of birthday brownies, one bowl of hershey's kisses with almonds, one ralph lauren (100 dollar) high heel, one bag of dog treats, one chicken sandwhich, and many many many bowls of food that belonged to Pepito. The most eventful of the list of course was the Hershey kisses with almonds... because Thor has been shitting gold nuggets that shine and glisten in the summer sun for 2 days. Needless to say, he's a lucky pup for eating all that garbage and not getting sick... Oh Thor...

That brings me to today... in the midst of yet another boring work week... filled with old men cursing, my 21 year old lab partner's foul and entertaining stories and a boss who promises me things that I will never ever recieve... such as a raise, a better position and dinner to name a few...

Now the future holds many exciting things... first and foremost, tomorrow. Thursday, my last day of work for the week which yields the ever anticipated weekend... Michael and I will be headed to Gaithersburg, MD to help Ben and Jackie while leaving the little pooch with Nana Gina and the big monster with Grandma Alice. Thank god for angels, i.e. mothers.

Next weekend, also and exiciting one... Friday, Luau in Chambersburg hosted by one of Michael's army buddies... Again, the dogs will be left with mothers (thank god for them)... Saturday, the Foreman/Gray housewarming picnic!! I'm so excited for that... I love this seemingly neverending chain of picnics...

The following weekend includes the ICO company picnic... Which, since I work with all crazy people, should be one for the record books. That evening I will be attending Legends to accompany Channy on her 24th b-day, with all the ladies of course... Hopefully, another run-in with John Gosselin will not be on the list of events for the night.

And the big summer finale!!! Assateague!! Its gonna be an exciting and eventful end of summer.

Somewhere in there, Michael starts school and I start EMT classes. How that's going to fit into my schedule of picnics, hasn't really occurred to me until this very moment... which leaves me the option of calling RACC and changing my classes to the next session which starts in December... I'm pretty sure I'll be able to work around it. I'm pretty resiliant in my young age.

I'd post pictures, but to be honest, I'm too lazy!

Thats all for now folks.

9 clayton ave--- before

2009-07-10T14:00:00.000-07:00

hardly working...

2009-07-10T13:13:00.000-07:00

1. Where did you take your profile pic?
<~ that one is from ocean city NJ, the other one on my profile is from cozumel mexico!

2. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Belikin Beer shirt from Belize

3. What is your current problem?
I am at work and I would rather not be...

4. What makes you happy most?
my loved ones, family, friends, aminals, my house and the fact that everything in it is not mine, its ours :)

5. What's the name of the song that you're listening to?
Hit em up? I dunno its some silly song on the radio

6. Any celeb you would marry?
only one person I'd marry...

7. Name someone with the same birthday as you.
Krystal

8. Ever sang in front of a large audience?
yep in HS

9. Has anyone ever said u look like a celebrity?
someone told me christina applegate, but i just don't see it

10. Do you still watch kiddy movies or kiddie TV shows?
i <3 cartoons, and we just watched finding nemo 2 nights ago

11. Do you speak any other language?
i know some german and some spanish...

12. Has anyone you've been really close with passed away?
unfortunately, yes

13.Do you ever watch MTV?
never ever ever

14. What is something that really annoys you?
BAD DRIVERS! and new jersey, the two go hand in hand

Chapter 1:
===============

1. Middle name:
Marjorie

2. Nickname(s):
T-bizz, bizzle, t-bag, t-rock, bartowski, blondy, blue eyes

3. Current location:
6355 Farm Bureau Road, Allentown PA 18106, to be precise.

4. Eye color:
blue

Chapter 2:
===============

1. Do you get along with your parent(s):
yes indeed.

2.Are your parents married/separated/divorced
married, for a looong time

Chapter 3: Favorite
===============

1. Ice Cream:
bubble gum!!!!!

2. Season:
summer!

Chapter 4: Do You..
===============

1. Dance in the shower?
sometimes

2. Do you write on your hand?
a lot!

3. Call people back?
only if i like them

4. Believe in love?
very much so

5. Any bad habits
leaving drawers, cabinets and such open... hehe

6. Any mental health issues?
WORK-A-HOLIC

Chapter 5: Have You..
===============

1. Broken a bone?
a few small ones

2. Sprained anything?
yes definately.

3. Had physical therapy?
yup

5.Taken painkillers?
yup

6. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling?
snorkeling yes... i really really want to go scuba diving

7. Been stung by a bee?
yup

8. Thrown up at the dentist?
haha no? does that normally happen?

9. Sworn in front of your parents?
yes, always

10. Had detention?
never.

Chapter 6: Who/What was the last
===============

1. Movie(s)
finding nemo!

2. Three people to text you?
mike, gennie, annie

3. Person you called?
amanda

4. Person you hugged?
mike :)

5. Person you tackled?
haha? i haven't really done much tackeling lately

6. Person you talked to on IM?
oh geeze, don't really do the im thing anymore

7. Thing you touched?
keyboard.

8.Last thing you ate
flavor blasted goldfish nothin' but nacho!!! POW

9. Thing you drank?
pepsi

10. Thing you said?
I dunno, i haven't said anything in a while, i'm all alone in the lab today

=============== How I end my sentences==============

1. My ex...
is not important.

2. Maybe I should...
go in the office and take a nap! screw work

3. I love...
animals

4. People would say that I...
am insane

5. I don't understand why...
i don't get paid more to sit at work and blog! haha

6. When I wake up in the morning I...
play with my puppy

7. I lost my...
faith in the system.

8. Life is full of...
ups and downs

9. My past is...
interesting, and makes for good story tellin'

10. I get annoyed very quickly...
when people underestimate me

11. Parties are ...
necessary

12. I wish life was not...
so full of work

13. Dogs are...
the greatest, best friends in the world

14. Cats are ...
stupid pets, and they make me itchy and sneezy

15. Tomorrow is...
going to be full of fun!! rain or shine :-)

16. I have a low tolerance for...
caffiene

17. If I had a million dollars...
i'd rescue all the puppies in shelters!

18. I'm totally terrified...
of nothing worth mentioning

19. My spouse is going to be...
Michael <3 whether he likes it or not!

20. Money is...
a pain in the butt... the more you make, the more they take. what the heck.

like it, love it, gotta have it!

2009-07-05T09:35:00.001-07:00

ah home sweet home... settling down, painting, decorating, fixing and what not. love it.

<3 more blogging later

I feel like bouncing!

2009-06-29T17:09:00.000-07:00

Ah excitement!!! Settlement tomorrow!!! I honestly think I need a sedative... because all day long, my heart has been beating like a hummingbird's. Did you ever get so excited you can't feel fingers and your toes?!? Maybe that's just me... but really... I'm stuck in the never ending cycle of almost crying happy tears and passing out from excitement. The adrenaline is pumpin!!! I feel like I could definately stay up, all night, and be awake all day tomorrow and paint and move every peice of furniture we have by myself. Ecstatic does not even cover it. I think the best part about it all is that my parents are out of town... and by the time they get back we'll be moved into our new house!!!! I feel so.. grown up :-D The funny thing is, I think about how much I couldn't WAIT to get out of hamburg... and now I can't WAIT to spend the rest of my life in the silly little town. It really is just too freaking cute. Its really true though... most of us Hamburgians just never leave!

Ahh I get to bask in the glory of our adorable brick capecod for the rest of my life. I'm so happy... :-D I feel like bouncing! and going WeEEEeeeEEEE!!!!! Some one pinch me... I feel like I'm in heaven.

<3

a butterfly with wet wings...

2009-06-27T14:15:00.000-07:00

Ah yes, yet another Saturday spent at ICO... while everyone else is sipping frosty beverages, soaking up the sun and laughing with their friends and loved ones... here i rott. Now, I must say that althought I despise working on Saturdays, I find it necessary to eat up as much company time as possible... because, afterall, I spend a majority of my time here surfing the internet, blogging, and of course facebook stalking. So all in all, I'm not necessarily the loser here. However, I think I'm low on vitamin D from lack of sunlight. I'm also low on excitement... due to the excessive amounts of time spent reading the news and catching up on the latest celebrity gossip, which really in turn, makes me low on brain cells as well. All work and no play make Tara... TaraBull. Hmmf. I truly want to throw a full on temper tantrum... stomping feet, crying, throwing things, yelling and all... WAHHH!!! :'(

To be completely honest, I could walk out the door right now and no one could even say anything about it. Saturday is "make your own schedule day." But unfortunately I'm feeling guilty about the 30$ bar tab Mike and I racked up at Cousins last night... and I just feel a bit better knowing that I'm making up for it. Consequently that means giving up another Saturday that could be spent drinking and socializing. I think the biggest blow this job has produced has been to my social life. I'm like a butterfly with wet wings... *sigh*

I guess this is the American dream... work your life away to have things you can't really afford. Yet, we forge on... a whole shit ton of us... 90% of our lives consist of work, sleep and food leaving a mere 10% for fun activities. You'd think spending this much time working... you couldn't even fathom spending 100% of your paycheck, in 10% of your time... but oh yes, it happens.

Its absurd to wrap my mind around the fact I've been doing this job for nearly a year... I'm surprised I have any friends at all... I truly am that girl who always works. Crap.

And this is my entertainment for the day... :-P

easy as 1,2,3...

2009-06-25T16:58:00.000-07:00

Oh M.J. one of my favorite and beloved pop stars. I always defended you during the bad times... I hope you're in celebrity heaven. Many tears will be shed for you today.

And Farrah Fawcett... the Girl Next Door... who made blond hair blue eyes beautiful babes what they are today..

Ed McMahon... not really a fan... but sad to see you go, all the same.

Bad things come in threes they say.... but when you think about it, 3 to me, is a different 3 to someone else... which is exponentially, and devistatingly, tragic.

Here's to having the strength to hope for a better tomorrow... and carrying on... taking life one day at a time, while we still can. Our time here is precious... we should spend it smiling... because tomorrow is another chance, to make the best of what we have. Remembering the lost... with smiles on our faces of the precious, wonderful memories we had... and all the more amazing times we will have in the future, with you in our hearts. With love to all we've lost...

there's no place like home...

2009-06-23T17:05:00.000-07:00

Less than 1 week til closing and I'm absolutely ecstatic. Everything is falling so nicely into place. All the peices of the puzzle are present and accounted for. We have all our ducks in a row and our eggs in plenty of different baskets. The paint colors are picked, the furniture is gathered, fridge is on hold, hot tub is bought, boxes are collected, schedules are cleared, parents' have been alerted. There's no stopping us now... homeownership, here we come.

I thought that the most exciting day of my life would be a toss up between getting married and having a baby... but this house-buying thing has got to be up there. So far, buying a house is definately better than getting a puppy... a big-girl job... moving across the country... graduating college... my first apartment... graduating highschool... first car... prom... my first kiss... first date... but then again, I guess the excitement progresses as the years go by... and all these firsts are the building blocks of the next. Its times like these where I wish i kept a scrapbook of all the first in my life. For what an accomplishment it would be looking at the progression from graduating kindergarten.. losing my baby teeth... so on and so on until today, right now, all grown up, in love and buying a house.

Ever since college I've had some kind of complex that no matter where I lived, no place felt like home... I was constantly clicking together my ruby slippers in hopes something would wisk me away to a place I could call home... Maybe along that yellow brick road of life I've learned all the lessons I'll ever need to know.... I'm thrilled to say that I no longer feel like a drifter.

give me a lollypop and I'll tell you to suck it.

2009-06-21T20:34:00.001-07:00

I've come to realize something this weekend... I've officially sold my soul to corporate america. Lets just break down my "weekend" for you all. I worked 3-11:30pm on Friday... came home, slept a bit, woke up at 6:30am to work at 8am... Worked from 8am-5:30pm... went home, went out to dinner, hung out with my brothers, went to the bar til 2am, hung out with some people til like 3:30am? Woke up at 10am-ish... did some window shopping... bought a HOT TUB! Went to Michael's to hang out with Alice and Daniel... came home, slept for an hour... woke up at 10pm, went to work at 11pm and I'm stuck here til 7:30am.

Just a short recap... Second shift-Friday, First shift- Saturday, Third shift- Sunday. Why would any sane human being do this to themselves? Money. Why am I physcially and mentally exhausted? Money. Money Money Money Money. I now know why people have nervous breakdowns... the more you work, the more money you make, the more taxes they take out... and you're working your ass off... and barely making enough to pay the bills let alone afford all of the amenities I desire... appliances, furniture, paint, decorations, trinkets, vacations, a deck, a finished basement, hot tub, pool, faux stone finish, kitchen tile, and other such HGTV-esk items. Why does it seem like the more money you make, the more you desire? You think the money would be enough... but it never is. When I was flat broke, I was as happy and desireless as a clam... give me food and shelter, I was freaking set. Get me a job, put some money in my bank account and all I want is stuff. I want a house, I want nice things, I want I want I want. And greed is one of those seven deadly sins... not like I think I'm gettin' into heaven anyway... but it makes me feel like a bad person. I don't think I've ever wanted so much in my entire life. Even as a child... give me a lollypop and a stuffed animal I'm the happiest blond hair blue eyed beauty you've ever seen. Now, give me a lollypop and I'll tell you to suck it... I want something way better than sugar on a stick. I wan creme brule, banana's foster, tiramisu. Give me a stuffed animal... yeah, suck on that too. That peice o' junk's a dog toy. Give me a stainless steel dishwasher, a glass range-top and a dark teal washer/dryer combo. So I want these things, and I want them now... and the only way to get it is to make more money... work more hours... leaving less and less time for me to love my hunny, play with my dog, use all my expensive stuff! Its a viscious cycle... you buy things to save time because you don't have any time because you're constantly working to make more money so you can buy things, to save time and money. It makes my brain cells scream. I feel like such... an American. A stereotypical, keep up with the Jones', my shits better than your shit, kind of yuppy that I always hated. I used to be a minimalist... whatever I had was all I needed. Now I'm a materialist. I have to say it does make me feel "grown up" but inside I still want my lollypop. Growing up, having responsibilities isn't something I truly ever imagined myself doing. I was never a fan of "stuff." Now, I love stuff. I want more stuff. I need stuff.... stuff stuff stuff. Its easier to fall into the "stuff" market than it was to stay out and badmouth it. Hell yes, I want STUFF! Things, things to do, things to do nothing with, junk, a sign in my bathroom that says "BATH 5 CENTS." I want knick nacks and doo dads and things with no purpose. I want to fill glass jars, with glass beads and sit them on shelves that are only used to hold my glass jars with glass beads! I want a hot tub, because I've been working my ass off so I can get nice shit.. and I damn well better be able to come home from a long day at work and take advantage of my money, in STUFF form! I feel like I sold out... but I fucking love it. I'm hungry for stuff... I like to walk through stores and pick stuff up, but never buy it... because I'm too good for that stuff. I need better stuff, the best stuff. And if I'm lucky, it'll be on sale. I'll find it at a yard sale, Marshalls, BigLots! Hell yes. This money grubbing, greedy little bitch is a bargain shopper. And why? because you can get more stuff if you don't pay as much for it. I'm always on the prowl for a good find. Hell yes we bought a $6,000 hot tub for $1000 dollars! Where, craiglist mother fuckers. CRAIGSLIST of CHAMPIONS! Where's my favorite necklace from- EBAY. SUCK IT! It was cheap, and it is AWESOME. I love it, I love it, I love it. Bargains bargains bargains! And you know what else? I'll sell someone else my junk, so I can get better junk. You bet your ass, I will. Who says the best things in life are free? The best things in life are ON SALE! Hell yes. The best things in life are $.89 cent burritos, 5 dollar foot-longs, upgrades, bartered. I've got the fever... the fever for a blue light Walmart special. The fever for the FREE section on Craigslist. The FEVER for Ebay! The fever for yardsales and bargain stores, hell even ground scores, curb finds, dumpster diving. Bring it on I say! Bring it on. I guess this is what happens when you become a home owner. The more stuff you own, the more stuff you want to own, another viscious cycle. Then comes upgrading... you can always upgrade... new shit comes out, every single day. Something that's 1 year old is outdated... especially with all this new crazy technology. And "green living" there's always crazy new ideas! Why not get a solar feild? Why not a tankless water heater? Why not collect rain water to flush the toilets... this shit is genius! It saves you money, so you can buy more shit! Oh these market geniuses have really got their claws in me... Them Jones's is screwed son... Move over hunny.. I've got this shit on lock down. Maybe I'm trying to out do my big brothers... maybe it just about finally doing things for myself... But really... its about impressing myself. Its about impressing my loved ones and showing my family I'm not just the little sister. I'm grown up now... I've fallen in love with Mike, I've fallen in love with a house, and I'm going to fall in love with everything in that house. Its about commitment.... and its about love. And I'm in love and absolutely commited to all the stuff I have and will have in the future. Its about... settling down... getting comfortable in the life I want to live forever. Its about our white picket fence, somewhere that's green, with our 2.5 kids and our mini van. Its about sacrificing what I had for what I want and never giving up my dream to live "happily ever after."

sometimes love just happens.. and it happens hard and it happens fast... and you know that in your heart and in your soul.. it just doesn't get any better than this. and I know as long as I live, I'll be happy as long as we can stay, just like this forever

monday feels like Theusday? 0.o

2009-06-19T14:56:00.000-07:00

When Friday feels like Monday... and Saturday feels like Tuesday... Sunday feels like Wednesday... Monday is Theusday? Wunday? Frusday? Materday? Thunday? Wuesday?Tonday? Muesday?

Now I'm no genius... the days of the week tend the blur together in a mishmosh of memories when you work on the weekends...

I guess in the end it doesn't really matter what day it actually is... but its nice to know... if i were to get in a horrific car accident and the EMT's asked me what day it was.. I'm certain I would answer incorrectly. Do I have brain damage? Or am I simply a work-a-holic? Maybe there's truly no difference between the two... I am disabled... time-disabled, socially disabled... I believe this is an illness that plagues many. Perhaps there should be a W.A. work-a-holics anonymous. The largest orgnization of hardworking Americans plagued by bills and mortgages, mouths to feed... Government funded.... mandatory weekly meetings... 12 hours of social interaction among peers away from the workplace. Paid weekly vacation for all. Decreases in crime... increase in buying, increase in libido! What a dream.

Dear Mr. President Obama,

Work-a-holism is plaguing the country. I am proposing that work-a-holics be compensated for their emotional stress. We are disabled human beings. Work-a-holics suffer from depression, insomnia, constant worry, anxiety, back aches, neck aches, bunyons, tendonitis, carpal tunnel, arthritis, muscle aches, pains, early onset diabetes, erectile dysfunction even! And, that's just scratching the surface. We need fair and just compensation for our troubles. It is work-a-holics that keep this country going... the over-worked, the under-paid, the shit on, the underdogs, the low man on the totem pole, the always deserving of a raise that never sees a dime, the over-taxed, the un-insured, the 2 job man, the penny pincher, the smart shopper. We are socially disabled, sleep deprived, broke, bill paying, law abiding citizens who need a break, a paid vacation, a free massage, a shopping spree, a hug, a new car, a raise, a tax deduction, a pre-paid credit card, an interest free loan, free education, and for Christ's sake free health care. Throw us a freaking bone here!!!

Sincerely,

The concerned citizens of America.

Craigslist... list of champions.

2009-06-16T17:21:00.000-07:00

Searching craigslist...

Size 20 jeans.
1950's Toilet.
Old Lumber.
Free bricks.
Ladies Poncho.
Kittens.
Hotdogs.
Soy milk.
Free Manure!
62 Impala.
Beer stein.
Hospital bed.
Red sandals 6.5.
Irish knit sweaters.
Nitrous kit.
Pirates of the caribbean t-shirt.
Boat anchor.
Front door.
Love seat.
Assorted car parts.
Air jordans.
Rear view mirror.
Elmo chair.
Wedding dress.
Turtle sandbox.
Scooby-doo table.
Snowblower.
Bread.
Guinea pig.
Broken TV.
Aquarium.
Free teeth whitening.
Paint.
Baby food jars.
Soap.
Free chunks of concrete.
Junk.
Piano.
Pregnancy books.
Poplar trees.
Magazines, years old.
FREE ORGANS.

yardsales and hard tales.

2009-06-13T14:01:00.000-07:00

Ah, a night I will never forget. The Penguins won the cup. It was a sad day in the lives of many as my beloved Red Wings skated off the ice, heads held high up in their asses... Tis a sad sad tale. So, we drank pitty beers in Kempton... Fun times, had by all in the hippied little farmhouse that could very well be in violation of many codes...

The day began at 7am, for some much needed unloading and uploading of things. Twas indeed a successful day. Things were sold, and given away... Things were found and purchased but as always, the best things in life are FREE! Ah, no sale could be better. So I spent the day with my lover, and got some money and some free stuff too. No one really loses on days like this. Especially when coinstar and a sack full of nickels is involved.

Ah yes, and now I spend yet another Saturday in the dusty pits of labor. Overtime is sweet. Monetarily speaking, today was a haul. Not to mention, it was completely painless. It feels like Christmas!!!

I feel as though I should come up with some sort of yard sale metaphor for life, as is my style... metaphors, simmalies... and that kind of happy grammar junk. Ah yes, junk. One man's junk is another man's pain in the ass... only when one's mind is deep in the gutter would some one think of some man-butter. Maybe life is really like a yard sale... We're all just passing stuff around until it finds its "forever home" around the world this thing might go, be it a spoon, or a unicorn... a pot, a lamp, a lover... Just passed around, exchanged hands over and over in hopes that someone will love it so much it won't come back to you again.

"Here are some shoes, I think you'll like them... "
"Sorry ma'am they're not for me..."
"How bout you? You like these shoes?"
"Sorry ma'am, I don't wear shoes, see?"
"What about you? These shoes look like they're made for you!"
"Why yes why yes! I love those shoes,
can I please take them off of you?"
"Of course of course, but for a price...
afterall, they're really really really nice..."
"They are! they are! I love them so!
How could you ever let them go??"
"Just take 'em will you? Have them for free!
afterall those shoes... they just aren't for me!
They were meant for you, I know
That is why I must let them go..."

If only life were that easy... Something/ someone doesn't work for you... Don't you wish you could just give them to someone else? Ah life would be a little easier if it were like a yard sale... its easier to let things go... when they have another home to go to.

This truly isn't making any sense... I guess what I'm trying to say... is if you're not happy with what you have, just know there's someone out there, somewhere looking for the hand that you've been dealt. And today, in yard sale land... all is right with the world... everything in its place... everyone with a smile on their face. :-D

<3 Tara-fic <3

I forgot about this blog.

2009-06-10T21:38:00.000-07:00

All you have to do is fucking... know shit!

<3

a day in the life of a terror.

2009-02-25T17:43:00.000-08:00

Blogging is fun, or so I'm told. Figured I'd take a stab at it... I'm not feeling very witty today howver, my place of employment is a complete creativity stifle. Small room, no windows, clean stark white... everything. Idiotic employees... but hey that's life and we all have to live it... I just think about the people that have to get up everymorning to clean the toilets at Taco Bell.... or the 30some year olds delivery my pizza and it all makes my life worth while. While some are slaving away working hard, on their feet just barely making ends meet... here I sit, watching American Dad and House on a computer in a comfy chair... comfy chair that SPINS! Oh yeah, bonus. Making decent money, wasting my intelligence, sitting on my ass. Its sad, yet awesome at the same time, kind of like my puppy... dumb as a stump but cute as a button. I find irony in my situation I guess. Its interesting to say the least. Young, cute, athletic, smart able bodied college graduate... working in a lab, in a factory, doing a job that a one armed, non-english speaking, 5 year old could do. Today has been less than interesting... no one got fired, no one broke a finger, got into a fight, came to work drunk... the old men didn't have any dirty racist jokes for me.. Just a regular day.

I think what's getting me through it all right now at this moment is the thought of being on a Caribbean cruise in 48 days. Ahhhh the beach, the sand, the ocean, my man. I'm super excited. But as any women concerned and fearful that I will not be the hottest young peice of ass on the shores... So what? I'm exercising *groan*.... walking the dog every morning, not eating an entire box of girl scout cookies in 1 sitting, or a whole bag of chips... yeah. I can pack away the food like its my job and still hold at a strong 120. However, bikini season always makes me a little leary... so I try to get my winter flub under control and tighten up a bit. Good stuff really... Anyway... I'm thinking of investing in an ABROCKET!!! (as seen on TV of course) My mother, who usually objects to me spending money on anything, obviously objects to me spending money on something to make me look like a super-hot Victoria's secret model. But me, on the other hand... it would be completely work the 97$ to post pictures of my looking smoking hot on my Myspace and rub it in all the poor schlubs faces who let me get away or took me for granted, cheated on me and broke my heart. You can't put a price on that.

Life is good, don't get me wrong but everyone's made some relationship mistakes... and every now and then it feels absolutely amazing to rub it in... I'm happy, I'm hot and I'm hey, I'm taken!! MMmm hm. It feels good, and it'll feel even better after I have "abrocket abs" hahahaha.
Ahh yes... only 2.5 more hours of this 2nd shift hell I live in.

It'll all be worth it someday... when I'm rich a famous for something... god only knows what... It'll be interesting though, that's for sure. But all I know is that I'm entirely to interesting to sit here and rott the rest of my life... Something bigger and better is out there, and its calling my name... I hear it in the distance... I just have to get a big closer before I can hear what its saying.

'Til next time..

TaraBull.

TaraBull

Tara Beretsky and Michael Hartman's Wedding

sick and tired...

baad blogger! BAD BAD BLOGGER!

inspiration board number 9,854,265

another inspiration...

dressing the bridal party...

Call me spoiled...

hit the GOLD MINE!!

programs!

TABLE RUNNERS!

Haha

its been a hail of a day!

tied up... and twisted!

Home improvement!

WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!!!!

tan suits!

in love...

off the cuff... link.

with this ring...

yuengling to the rescue!!!

yes yes... ANOTHER inspiration board...

wedding party inspiration...

more inspiration...

You're my inspiration!!

Hairspiration!

weddinginging

Dresses Dresses Dresses!!!!!

Ms. Indeshoesive.

Call me shredder...

*gasp* using the internet at work

RED SHOES!

to bee or not to bee

1 song.

very very sad news...

my first tutorial :-)

Snow day!!!

Weekend recap

what a day

really need to start editing my typos

"The One"

looking for inspiration...

The wedding tree!!!!

weddingbee!

throat amphibians.

Sand and Champagne

full of news...

Becky Pets a Dog

Thank you antibiotics!!!

re-cap, 09

beating myself up...

Rocky Raccoon...

and the planning begins...

Engagement excitement!!!!

late nights.

its been a while...

the forgotten blog...

9 clayton ave--- before

hardly working...

like it, love it, gotta have it!

I feel like bouncing!

a butterfly with wet wings...

easy as 1,2,3...

there's no place like home...

give me a lollypop and I'll tell you to suck it.

monday feels like Theusday? 0.o

Craigslist... list of champions.

yardsales and hard tales.

I forgot about this blog.

a day in the life of a terror.

gasp using the internet at work